


Love is a Weapon

by paintin_the_planet_blue



Series: Run me like a River [2]
Category: Star Wars: Rebellion Era - All Media Types, Star Wars: Rebels, Star Wars: Thrawn Series - Timothy Zahn (2017)
Genre: Eli does show up but not that long because he is Important and Busy, M/M, Past Thranto, Space Drugs, Xeno, Xeno dick, a surprise to be sure but a welcome one, bad schemes, betrayal is personal, blue boys do it better, everybody hates Pryce, everybody loves Faro, ignoring your job so you can f u ck, make it 69 kudos you cowards, thank you wookiepedia for existing, the actual timeline is the other way around with the books but fuck it, the white loth-cat, who invited Benj Dobbs, xeno smut, you have the heart of a rebel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-19
Updated: 2021-03-05
Packaged: 2021-03-15 05:28:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 27,760
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29554254
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/paintin_the_planet_blue/pseuds/paintin_the_planet_blue
Summary: Agent Kallus of the ISB was assigned to assess Grand Admiral Thrawn's loyalty. His chosen method of seduction goes... mostly as planned.
Relationships: Alexsandr Kallus/Thrawn | Mitth'raw'nuruodo, Thrawn | Mitth'raw'nuruodo/Eli Vanto
Series: Run me like a River [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2207934
Comments: 45
Kudos: 69





	1. Kallus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Agent Kallus makes some hasty decisions.

This assignment was certainly a step in a much different direction than what Agent Kallus was used to. Infiltration? Sure. Seduction? Well, he was capable of it, to be sure. That intensive week-long training session saw to that. He wasn’t sure that his body would ever feel the same. Considering the enhancements he’d received for this particular assignment, he was certain thathe’d be feeling this way for some months. Considering that he was testing the loyalty and uncovering more information about a high-ranking Imperial officer, he was glad for his enhancements, uncomfortable as they were be.

The Lambda class shuttle began its descent into the docking bay of the _Chimera_ and Kallus took a deep breath, pushing any fear or trepidation out of his mind. It wasn’t like his target was ugly. Just... different. Scrolling through art the night before and picking out erotic pictures of human/alien contact had been interesting. His data pad was filled with scandalous sculptures and erotic etchings. A present for his target. Oh, he’d study it but he wouldn’t learn anything more than there was an ISB agent ready to please.

He hoped. He hoped to hells that it would work. There was a very likely chance that his target would figure him out and then would likely not play along. Kallus glanced at his carrybag. That’s why he had a pharmacy of stimulants that could change his body chemistry to be utterly irresistible. He had plans and backup plans. He would not fail. He could not fail.

The shuttle’s ramp lowered and Kallus got a good look at what was his new home as he exited. The air felt different from the other ships he’d been on. More charged somehow. As he passed stormtroopers and officers alike, they all seemed determined to be at their very best because their command was compelling. Kallus could hardly wait. He hoped his mission wouldn’t ruin the dynamic of this ship - they’d been doing excellent work for the Empire. Still, much was unknown about this upstart alien admiral.

But it wouldn’t remain unknown for long.

Kallus clenched his fist as he stood outside his destination. A patch of stimneedles jabbed his neck, hidden by his high collar. A gleeful chemical espionage scientist had explained that each would change his body chemistry to produce irresistible pheromones for his target only. It wouldn’t do to have the crew falling head over heels for him. Kallus would have liked to see that happen.

Chills ran up his spine as a voice that he was going to become very familiar with called for him to enter. Kallus squared his shoulders, his posture perfect as he entered the office. His target, Grand Admiral Thrawn turned to face him, glowing red eyes studying him carefully. Kallus felt his heartrate rise, in part due to the chemicals in his bloodstream and in part due to his own excitement.

“Agent Kallus of the ISB reporting.”

Thrawn inclined his head. “And why has the ISB sent you to me, Agent?”

Oh, if only he knew. “I am here to serve at your leisure, sir.”

“I suppose that’s all I’ll get out of you.” Thrawn moved to sit behind his desk, gesturing for Kallus to sit before him. Kallus acquiesced, setting his carrybag carefully on the floor next to him. He thought of the vials within and what they could do to a man.

“You may find this helpful.” Kallus slid his data pad across the desk to Thrawn.

The art was listed before any of his own details, the unclassified parts of his mission which was to serve as an aid to Thrawn. Kallus would definitely do that much, to be sure. But that wasn't his goal. Kallus watched Thrawn carefully, trying to determine if the man would be receptive to him or if his mission would end as soon as it started. Glowing eyes scanned what Kallus knew was the art he had selected. There was no possible way that Thrawn would skip over it. His fascination with art was not a rumor.

Red eyes looked away from studying his face as Thrawn tapped on the data pad. “Your quarters will be across from mine. It seems that you will be a useful asset in eliminating these rebels. I look forward to working with you.”

His neck ached from the injection. “As do I, Grand Admiral.” He let the faintest bit of desire into his voice as he spoke the title, hoping to push Thrawn to a bit more action. If he could establish something immediately, that would be ideal. At the very least, he wanted to know if the chems were working.

Thrawn checked his chrono. “I am heading to my quarters, if you’d like to accompany me. The _Chimera_ can be a maze to newcomers.”

Most would make an excuse as to not burden a high ranking officer but Kallus had no such qualms. He was a member of the ISB, which put him outside of the purview of the Navy. Besides, people feared the ISB, and with good reason.

“I would appreciate that.”

Thrawn circled the desk, brushing past Kallus in a way that he was sure the Chiss was deliberately getting a better sense of him. Kallus grasped his carrybag and followed Thrawn. Were the chems affecting him yet? Kallus hoped so. The burning in his neck certainly said that something was happening to him.

He followed the Grand Admiral, a step or so behind as was only polite. Besides, he needed to study Thrawn and how he interacted with the crew. Mostly he was working off of rumors. There had been a previous aid who had disappeared under uncertain circumstances. Rumor had it that they had been an item of some sort. No substantial proof, but the name Eli Vanto had come up more than a handful of times. Kallus kept a slight smile on his face as he followed Thrawn down the corridor. It was busy and Thrawn kept getting stopped by officers handing him data pads and asking general questions. Thrawn would answer them politely but Kallus recognized a slight bit of annoyance upon receiving the ninth data pad. Was it normally like this? Was the flow of information somehow related to his arrival? Either way, as soon as the underlings saw his distinctive black uniform, they beat a hasty, drab olive retreat.

  
“You’ve had a long journey from Coruscant, Agent. You must be tired.”

  
Kallus was tired, actually. The combination of the intensive training for this mission and the long journey to the Outer Rim had him wanting nothing more than a long shower and at least a full eight hours of sleep. But he was an agent of the ISB and his mission came before personal comfort.

  
“Not too tired, Grand Admiral. I’m certain I can make it until the end of this shift.” Kallus’s eyes widened as a strong blue hand grasped his shoulder and steered him out of the way of a group of troopers that he hadn’t noticed. He looked at Thrawn to see a flicker of bemusement cross his face, one eyebrow arched as if to say _really_?

“We’re nearly there, Agent Kallus. Not to worry, you’ll be granted a full rest cycle. I have found that a well-rested crew is most valuable.”

That could explain the atmosphere on the _Chimera_. If everyone was actually getting full sleep cycles, then it was no wonder that everything seemed to be functioning so smoothly. That was an issue with some of the other ships he’d visited. Sure, the crew was busy, but they weren’t functioning at their best. Good to know.

“I suppose I am more tired than I care to admit.” He resisted the urge to rub his eyes. No need to overdo it. Kallus still needed to make a good impression on Thrawn.

This hallway was much less busy with only a few troopers on regular patrol. Kallus figured they had entered the commanding officers quarters. It was mid afternoon which was always the worst time to arrive anywhere. Still too early to rest, but too late to get any real work started. Unfortunately, it didn’t seem like his mission would truly begin today.

“Your quarters, Agent.” Thrawn stopped, gesturing towards the door. “If anything is amiss, please let me know.” He inclined his head across the corridor where Kallus presumed the Admiral’s quarters were. They were awfully close to each other.

“I intend to give the ISB my full cooperation.” Thrawn gave a slight smile and crossed the hall, code cylinder in hand as he prepared to enter his quarters.

  
“It’s not for a court marshal or anything-“ Kallus said, recalling that Thrawn had been court marshaled several times.

“I’ll admit that is a relief.” Thrawn did seem to be reassured by that statement, red eyes flicking from the doors of his quarters back to Kallus, studying him once more. “Agent, once you are settled in, I’d like it if you joined me for a drink.”

  
Kallus perked up, his exhaustion almost totally forgotten with those words. Promising, very promising. “I’d enjoy that very much, sir.”

  
“Good. Would two hours be a sufficient amount of time?”

Seven hells yes it would. Kallus nodded, trying his absolute best to not look overeager.

“I’ll see you then.”

With that, Thrawn turned on his heel and entered his quarters. Kallus stared at his back for the few seconds he got before the door closed. That man was lithe and those shoulders… Wow. Not a bad assignment at all.

Kallus opened the door to his quarters and entered, ensuring the door locked behind him. Things were automated that way, but an ISB agent was always paranoid about those sorts of things. His new quarters were nothing special, but certainly larger than what he was used to. There was even a small living area which was exciting. He doubted that he’d have anyone in here but Thrawn, if things went well. The bedroom was even better with the bed having an actual decent mattress on it and sheets that were somewhat soft. Ah, the privileges of the upper command chain.

He stripped out of his body armor and uniform, stretching out his muscles from the long journey in a purposefully uncomfortable shuttle. It didn’t help that the thin control panel adhered to his chest for his stims rubbed against his chest plate in the worst possible manner. Sure, it worked well but comfort was not the priority of the Empire.He opened his carry bag and removed the bo-rifle, setting it carefully at the end of his bed. Hopefully his new mission would allow him a break from blasting rebels. Kallus pushed aside his extra uniforms and pulled out the kit for maintaining his enhancements. Great. Now he’d be able to understand what was going on with his body. He’d been dosed… What? Three times today? Something should be changing in his body soon. Not that he’d be able to tell. Thrawn would be best indicator.

Kallus took the kit and entered the refresher (oh, that shower looked wonderful). With a slight wince, he extracted a cable from the control panel and plugged it into the kit. A special datapad blinked on, a green light scanning over him to read his vitals. Kallus skimmed the information on the readout. Nothing much had changed. There were some new hormones being activated, but it was still too early to tell what was really changing. He only understood about half of the information anyways. And he wasn’t going to spend the two hours that Thrawn had given him searching every term on the readout. He was going to take a most indulgent shower and then go from there.

-

Kriff - had he really taken that long? Between the shower and unpacking and putting away his uniforms, he was running close on time. This one lock of hair just wouldn’t stay in place and he’d slathered _a lot_ of gel on it. Kallus took a deep breath and pressed his hand to his head and then it finally stuck.

  
“Perfect.” He grinned at his reflection. Time to impress the Grand Admiral.

Kallus crossed the hall and raised a hand to knock at the door. It slid open before his hand made contact and the agent gave a mental shrug and stepped inside.

Thrawn’s quarters were much more dim than the rest of the ship and Kallus had to blink several times before his eyes adjusted. Lots of art, which he wasn’t surprised by. The room was crowded with holos, a few of which he recognized from the holo collection that he’d had on the data pad he’d given to Thrawn. Good, at least that had worked. Still, he didn’t see Thrawn. Where was that man?

Kallus heard a snarl that sent a shiver straight to his core and then a sound of metal being crushed. Neither sound made much sense, but Kallus walked boldly towards it regardless. He wasn’t sure what he’d find but Thrawn fighting off a pair of assassin droids with naught but his bare hands certainly wasn’t it and, oh man, his heart was racing as Thrawn absolutely dented the two droids, dodging blows that would certainly break bones if they made contact. It was impressive and utterly terrified Kallus. Thrawn could easily put him in the med bay if he wasn’t careful.

“Agent! My apologies!” Thrawn finally noticed Kallus as he snapped the metal neck of one of the droids, the other laying in the corner of his exercise room, a drawn out beep coming from it. Red eyes glowed brightly at Kallus as he wiped oil off his hands. “I’m afraid I lost track of time.”

  
“Oh, no, I apologize for… interrupting you.” Kallus was relieved that he didn’t stutter or fall to the ground, his knees weak at the sight of Thrawn in a black tank top and soft black exercise pants that were extremely suggestive to what was underneath.

“Not to worry, Agent Kallus. I fear that I might have gotten a bit out of hand. These repairs will be… extensive.” Thrawn exited the room, closing the door with a press of a button.

  
So Thrawn had been fighting for the last two hours? He wasn’t even sweating. His breathing rate was slightly elevated but that was it. Not a strand of hair was out of place.

“I can come back-“

  
“No, no. That won’t be necessary, Agent.” Thrawn gave him a slight smile. “I’ll get you that drink.”

Kallus let out a sigh of relief as Thrawn moved quickly out of sight to what he assumed was the kitchen. Wow. That had been something. The agent walked back to the living area and settled in a cozy chair next to a holo sculpture that he recognized as coming from his data pad (and what he privately called The Bait Collection). Kallus considered the position the human was in and wondered if he was that flexible. Maybe. Thrawn was certainly strong enough to lift him if he could punch durasteel without flinching. Was it hot in here? Three needle pricks cut his thoughts off which were rapidly declining back to Thrawn’s strong shoulders and muscular back. Fourth dose. Okay. He wasn’t sure why this dose hit all three spots, but maybe that was a good sign.

Thrawn reappeared with two glasses half-full of a glowing blue liquid and handed one to Kallus as he took a seat opposite him. Kallus accepted the glass with a murmur of thanks, desperately hoping that it would dull the increasingly painful stim patches which now felt like brambles digging into his skin. Some other chemical must have been activated since he was in Thrawn’s presence. Something about monitoring his heart rate, he recalled.

“There’s something about you, Agent.” Thrawn leaned forward, studying Kallus as he sipped at his drink.

  
Kallus drained half his glass in shock, his face feeling like it was on fire. “I’d absolutely remember if we’d met before, sir.”

Thrawn waved a dismissive hand. “No, not quite in that way, Agent. Something about your… glow reminds me of someone else. That may be it.”

  
His glow? The way Thrawn had paused sounded like he was searching for the correct Basic word to describe his feeling. Or maybe it referred to his whole rumored infared vision.

“In a good way, I hope.”

  
“Oh, most certainly.”

Kallus was suddenly aware of just how close the two of them were, knees nearly touching. He heard Thrawn take a deep breath, a thoughtful look crossing his face before he leaned in again and took another breath. Kallus hardly dared to move but managed to take another casual sip, acting like he didn’t notice the non-human smelling him.

“Agent Kallus, what is it that you want with me? What game are you playing?”

“I-I’m…” Kallus struggled to find words, unable to look away from those red eyes as a cold blue hand ran down his jaw, thumb brushing over his lips.

“You wouldn’t smell like a Chiss if there wasn’t something going on.”

Kallus had taken a sip at the wrong time and started to cough. Great! So that’s what one of the effects was. Was he going to start turning blue too? Not that he’d mind, it was a lovely color, but still!

“Are you alright?”

  
“Yes, I-“ Kallus quickly drank the rest of his drink, setting it down a little too hard on the end table next to him. “I wouldn’t know where to begin.”

  
“Well,” said Thrawn. “I value honesty. Whatever you tell me will remain in strict confidence. You have my attention and my interest.”

Everything was hot all of a sudden. Kallus wished that he was wearing much less. If he started running his mouth, he’d be the worst ISB agent ever. “I couldn’t tell you…”

He wanted to, though. To be open and honest with this incredibly dangerous man was the safest path, but it wasn’t the one that he had been instructed to take. And if there was one thing Imperials knew how to do, it was to follow orders.

  
“Then I’ll make a guess, shall I?”

Great. He’d heard about Thrawn ‘guessing’ and he was almost always totally correct.

“I think you’re here to seduce me. And somebody has spared no credits in outfitting you.”

  
Kallus did his best to keep any reaction out of his face, trying to look away from Thrawn but finding that he just couldn’t stop staring at him. His mind was racing with probable outcomes, most sexual, some violent.

“I’m not going to say no to you,” Thrawn nearly purred the words. “Ever since Vanto… left, I’ve rather needed someone to fill that void. Even if that someone has ulterior motives. You are irresistible to me, Agent Kallus, and you don’t know the half of the effect those chemicals are having on me.”

Wow, this was hot, thought Kallus. Maybe he was actually good at this.

“But I want you to know,” Thrawn was standing now, drink abandoned as he pressed a hand to Kallus’ chest, leaning forward to speak into the human’s ear, “that I’m the one in charge here. Not one word about me or my people will reach your superiors unless it is information that I want them to know. Whatever information they are hoping that I will reveal to you, they will not receive. You have a choice, Agent Kallus. You can accept my offer and have your fill of me, never truly fulfilling a mission that gets drawn out, longer and longer -“

Kallus could not keep his eyes off of Thrawn’s mouth. It should be illegal to say those words with a voice like that.

  
“Or,” Thrawn shoved his hand against Kallus’ chest, accidentally (or maybe on purpose?) triggering the stims to dose him again. Kallus gasped, seeing stars as his body was flooded with more chemicals. “I can beat you bloody and send you back to the ISB where you will be humiliated for your abject failure.”

“That’s- that’s not much of a choice at all,” Kallus gasped, both terrified and aroused beyond anything he’d felt before.

“No, I suppose it isn’t. I think it’s very generous of me to even consider the first option when you desperately handed me a data pad filled with erotic art.” Kallus felt hot breath against his neck as Thrawn snickered, “Did you think that was clever, Agent Kallus? Did it not cross your mind that your little game had ended before it even could begin?”

Kallus couldn’t find words. He couldn’t hardly think straight with the sound of blood rushing in his head so loud that it nearly drowned out Thrawn’s next words.

“Your answer please, Agent Kallus.”

Well, he had totally lost control of the situation, though it was seeming like he never had a wampa’s chance on Mustafar of any control at all. The only leverage that he had, which wasn’t really leverage, was that the chemicals were driving Thrawn crazy. Kallus guessed that the Grand Admiral wouldn’t be this close to him if it wasn’t affecting him. Then again, he knew practically nothing about Thrawn and Thrawn had him totally figured out. The knee pressed against his crotch wasn’t helping him remember how to speak as Thrawn asked him again what his answer was.

If he said no, would Thrawn defeat him as effortlessly as he had those droids? Kallus knew he would, felt it in the pitch of his stomach as blue hands caressed his arms, pressing just a little too hard against fragile bone.

“I just need to hear you say it. Indulge me, Agent Kallus.”

How could he say no? Missing out on whatever Thrawn had to offer him would be the biggest mistake of his life. It would absolutely haunt him, if he survived whatever Thrawn did to him if he said no.

“The first option. Of course.” His voice came out much more steady than he felt.

Kallus bit back a whine as Thrawn’s weight lifted off of him as the man stood before him, a pensive hand pressed to his chin. “What shall I do with you, my dear Agent? This is quite the scenario that you’ve created for me.” White teeth flashed in a brief grin. “And I’m so looking forward to playing your game.”

Kallus shakily got to his feet, wobbling before pitching forward, his heart feeling like it was about to burst from his chest. Thrawn caught him with ease, a bit of concern in his face. “Have I broken you already, Agent?”

“No- no.” Kallus managed, fingers clumsily unbuttoning his collar enough that he could tilt his head, showing off one of the stim patches to Thrawn. “The chemicals… It’s just a lot.”

“Ah,” said Thrawn, his free hand gently touching the patch, eliciting a sharp hiss from Kallus. “You have more of these on your body, releasing stimulants into your blood stream, changing your hormones, making you smell like a Chiss in heat. Clever, very clever.”

  
“It wasn’t my idea,” Kallus mumbled into Thrawn’s muscular chest.

“The ISB must have too much time on its hands.”

Kallus managed to laugh at that and eased himself off of Thrawn. He still felt unsteady, but a little better. As long as Thrawn didn’t push on any of the patches, he’d be fine with the normal dosing schedule. If there was a schedule. Kallus wasn’t sure at this point. He had been incredibly busy and hadn’t paid that much attention to that part.

“The Empire prides itself on its training.”

“And it certainly turns out some fine people.” Thrawn’s eyes drifted over to the erotic art and then back to Kallus, studying him intently. He stepped backwards, regarding Kallus thoughtfully. “This should be interesting, Agent. I look forward to what you have in store for me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> title inspo by FOB of course, the best way to name a fic. these boys are the last of the real good imps, which is to say trash people.... I guess? 
> 
> howdy y'all. i love this blue bastard. and this mutton chop boy and all my Rebels friends. 
> 
> OPYOM was a mild, slight inspiration but not in the plagiarizing way or anything like that (this fic goes in a much different direction in a much different timeline anyways thanks). yikes. please be cool everyone. mostly just wanted some more Thrallus action of which there is only a smattering. sad. 
> 
> anyway, I hope you enjoy. don't forget to rate, review, and subscribe or whatever. and if your comment is nasty, I will delete it because I don't do that. thx bye.


	2. Kallus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Getting to know the crew's opinion of Thrawn. Kallus has an adverse reaction.

So far things were going fine. That was more than Kallus could have asked for when his hasty idea of putting art on the data pad had gone south. It was a long journey from Courscant, after all and not conducive to the best planning. Either way, he was in an excellent position to keep an eye on Thrawn and to gain more information from the crew. He wasn’t going to do anything too formal. There was no need to use the heavier interrogation tactics on those who were just serving their Empire. Easy questioning would do the job just fine.

Kallus set himself up in a break room with easy access to a caf machine and far away from his quarters. If there was anything that he was going to need for this, it was going to be a lot of caf. Hopefully it wouldn’t mess with the stimulants, but he was willing to take a chance on that. He took a deep sip of his caf and sighed. Truly the elixir of the gods.

There was no sense in delaying any further. Kallus started down the list of the crew requesting meetings to ask a few questions. He phrased it as gently as possible, hoping that the whole ISB thing wouldn’t make people too nervous. Free caf was always a good incentive. 

_Do you enjoy serving on the_ Chimera _?_

“It’s literally the best ship I’ve ever served on.”

“It has a giant chimera painted on it. What’s not to love?”

“The casualties are so much lower here. I’ve only lost one member of my squad in the last month.”

“The food’s better here.”

“There’s always something interesting happening, that’s for sure.”

“Lothal isn’t that bad. Granted, I haven’t been on the planet, but it sure is pretty from orbit.”

_How do you feel about Grand Admiral Thrawn?_

“Well, that’s kind of general, isn’t it? I respect him deeply as I feel the rest of the crew does. We don’t lose as many troops as some of the other admirals out there. Plus, the rebels we’re facing seem to be less lethal than some of the others out there so that’s nice.”

“He might be blue, but he sure knows how to command.”

“I gave him a painting once and he _smiled_ at me.”

“I don’t get the whole art thing, but it’s nice to see more decoration throughout the ship. It makes navigating the ship much easier when there’s actual landmarks.”

_What do you know about Grand Admiral Thrawn’s past achievements?_

  
“He shot down a stolen TIE fighter flying right at him with just a blaster.”

“I heard that he took out a whole squad of B2 battle droids in the Clone War with nothing but his bare hands.”

“He could go toe-to-toe with Darth Vader and win.”

“He figured out where a rebel cell was from nothing but graffiti.”

The overwhelming opinion of Thrawn was a positive one. It seemed like the crew didn’t quite understand their commander, but they respected. His past seemed rumored enough and Kallus doubted that any of what he’d heard was remotely true. There were a few officers that were now higher ranks that had served with Thrawn in the past. They might have better information that wasn’t just hearsay.

Kallus looked up from his data pad as Commodore Faro entered the break room and headed straight to the caf machine.

  
“I’ll be right with you, Agent.”  
  
“Of course,” said Kallus, inclining his head. “Thank you for taking the time.”

“Yeah, no worries. End of shift and all that. How can I help?” Faro sat across from him and set her cup of caf on the table after taking a sip and wincing at the heat.

“I was reading here that you’ve served with Thrawn before in the past.”  
  
“Yeah. I’m one of the staples of his crew, I guess.”

“And did you know Eli Vanto?” Kallus pressed. No one else had mentioned Vanto and he hadn’t brought up the human in regular questioning seeing as most hadn’t served with Thrawn before he’d lost his aid.

“Yes.” Faro’s response was curt and she took a pointed sip of her caf.

“Do you know what happened to him?”

Faro leaned forward. “Look, Kallus, I know you’re new here, in this ship, but there are some things that you shouldn’t go poking into. I know that’s your whole job and everything, but Vanto is a… sensitive subject.”

“And why is that?” Kallus raised an eyebrow.

“He was a good person. Was just supposed to be a supply officer out in the Outer Rim and then he meets Thrawn and for ten years, he’s just glued to his side. And then-“ Faro waved a hand in the air. “Gone. Thrawn wouldn’t talk about it. So maybe he’s dead. I don’t know.”

“What do you think happened?” Kallus pressed. Finally, he was getting some real and interesting information.

“Might be dead. Might be on some sort of long-term mission for the Empire.” She shrugged. “It’s hard to know. I only asked once.”

“What did Thrawn say?”  
  


“He just gave me a look. And I didn’t ask again.” 

  
Kallus looked down as his comm beeped. It was a message from Thrawn.

_If you’ve finished harassing my crew, we should speak._

“If you need anything else, Agent Kallus, feel free to comm me.” Faro stood up and took her caf with her. “Thanks for the drink.”

The door slid open and Faro flinched slightly at the sight of Thrawn standing patiently outside, waiting for Kallus. She looked back at Kallus with a smile that said surprising, but not totally unexpected, and headed on her way with a nod to her CO.

Kallus decided to play it cool and looked down at his datapad as if checking something. “Well, you’re not on my list, Admiral, but I suppose I could ask you a few questions.”

“I believe I have a few of my own, Agent Kallus.” The door slid shut behind him and the light on the control panel turned red to indicate it was locked.

“I’m sure you do.” He winced as the stims went off again. Definitely related to Thrawn’s presence.

“Indeed.” Thrawn studied the caf machine and the amount of empty caf pods littered around it. “What have you learned from my crew?”

“Well, nothing much of interest, sir.” Kallus laughed slightly, reviewing some of the more… interesting responses he had gotten. “Your crew admires you very much. Well, for the most part. And even the xenophobic ones still have some amount of respect for you.”

“Do not go looking for Eli Vanto.” Thrawn turned and faced him, those glowing red eyes piercing though him. “He is safe, but he is not here and you cannot go looking for him.”

Kallus had heard something about Thrawn’s hearing being keen, so he must have heard some (or all) of his conversation with Faro. It was out of nowhere and unexpected. “His name comes up often. He was with you for nearly a decade, after all.”

Kallus gasped as Thrawn moved way faster than a human ever did and grasped him by the tunic, pulling him out of his chair to hold him against the bulkhead, his hand pressing the stim pad deeper into his chest. He clenched his jaw as pain flowed through his chest.

“Do not look into him. Leave him alone. This is not up for debate, Agent.”

“Fine.” Kallus gasped out. He didn’t really care about Vanto - it was just that he was a bit of an enigma. If the man was gone, then he was gone. And Kallus certainly couldn't leave to go look for him when his main quarry was already here.

“Do you not remember the terms of our arrangement, Agent Kallus?”

Cold fingers ran down his jaw and Kallus swallowed reflexively. Thrawn was as close as he had been that first night, close enough for Kallus to see his darker red pupils blown wide. Kallus was half-terrified and half extremely aroused.

“Yes, of course I do, but I can’t just do nothing.” That wasn’t really true. There was the seduction part but other than that, the ISB wanted him to follow Thrawn’s orders. He’d report in when there was something to report, be that rebels or some actual development on Thrawn’s motives. Right now it looked like his only motive was to toy with Kallus.  
  
“I’m sure I can think of something.” Thrawn sighed, closing his eyes and looking away from Kallus. “You have no idea what those chemicals are doing to me.”  
  
“In all fairness, I have no idea what they’re doing to me either.” Kallus gave a half-assed grin and moved one hand to his chest attempting to pry Thrawn’s strong and cold hand away.

  
“I cannot imagine why you would volunteer for this if you did not know exactly what was being done to your body.” Thrawn eyed Kallus’ hand and let him go, the agent sliding to the floor with a sigh of relief.

“I was the only one that was interested,” Kallus mumbled, gingerly touching his chest. It didn’t seem like he was bleeding but he’d have to take his tunic off to be absolutely sure. Mostly his chest was just throbbing. When did the stim patches run out? Kriff, he really should have paid more attention in that particular briefing.

“What do you mean by that?”

“Uh, well, I guess the whole non-human thing is a real issue for some people.”

“That again.” Thrawn said flatly.

“Yeah, the Empire’s got some prejudice. Not me though. Even considering what I’ve done, I’m not that much of an asshole. I guess.” Was it getting hot in here? His undershirt felt sticky. Maybe it was blood. Maybe his body wasn’t reacting well. And why was he running his mouth while sitting on the floor? “I don’t have an issue with non-humans.”

“You’re burning up. That temperature is not the correct range for humans.”  
  
“Is it? Are you sure it’s not the environmental controls? I’m totally fine.” Kallus slowly got to his feet and immediately shut his eyes as the room started spinning. “Wow, are we in a battle or something?”

“We are not, Agent Kallus. I believe that…”

Kallus didn’t really remember anything more after that as everything went fuzzy. There were bits and pieces that he remembered later. Thrawn catching him. The beautiful blue bastard actually looking somewhat concerned for him. Being hurried down empty halls to avoid any of the crew. A dim room. A blur of blue and white and red as Kallus succumbed to darkness.

-

“Agent Kallus? Are you still with us?”

Kallus groaned as he cracked his eyes open. It felt like he’d gotten hit by a speeder. He looked for the source of the voice (it was Thrawn, of course. That voice couldn’t be mistaken for anyone else.) The Grand Admiral was sitting in a chair next to him examining something that Kallus couldn’t quite made out.

“I think so.”

“Good. You nearly died.”

“Well, it wouldn’t be the first time.” Kallus mumbled, managing to sit up a bit more.

“Yes, well, I wouldn’t want a member of the ISB dying on my watch. Especially not one sent to investigate me.”

Kallus laughed and immediately regretted it. “That would not look good.”

“No, it would not. Here.”

He rubbed his eyes, trying to focus on what Thrawn was handing him. “What do you have there?”

“Concentrated re-hydrating fluids?”

“No,” Kallus accepted the bottle and drank half of it before capping it and setting it to the side. “The spiky thing.”

“This was what was on your chest. There were two smaller ones on your neck.”

Kallus squinted and it came into focus. Oh. So that’s what a stim patch looked like when it wasn’t embedded into your skin. Definitely an Imperial invention because there was way more needles than seemed necessary or even efficient. “Huh.”

“Analysis showed that the chemical compound had been derived from my blood and that is what gave you such an adverse reaction. Granted, it did fulfill its purpose of making you incredibly attractive to my senses, so I suppose there’s that.”

“Mission accomplished, I guess.” Kallus said without really processing what Thrawn had admitted to.

“Also, it did turn your chest an incredible shade of blue that the bacta did not heal.”  
  
“I’ll let you rest. I am across the hall if you need anything.” He emphasized the last word again. “Anything.”

“Yes okay.” Kallus said, just trying to get the Grand Admiral out so he could go back to sleep and not think about what had been on his body for the last few weeks. The door to his room closed and the two things that Thrawn had casually mentioned sunk in.  
  
“Attractive? Blue?!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey kids, remember to pay attention whenever you get space aphrodisiacs installed. there may be side effects. 
> 
> Kallus: whatcha got there  
> Thrawn: a smoothie 
> 
> I thought they were gonna bone this chapter, but they didn't. maybe next one. we'll see where they want to go. 
> 
> I probably won't be updating every day but sometimes you just got to vomit this stuff up and stick it on the internets. 
> 
> hey. if you're reading and feel inclined, please leave a comment. if you're in the cold part of the US, I hope you're doing well. stay warm everyone.  
> (finger guns at you)


	3. Thrawn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> they Fuck

Thrawn paced his room as he thought through the events of the last few days. It might have been wise to tell Kallus just how long he’d been fighting against the effects of the stims, fading in and out of consciousness while a med droid carefully administered antibiotics and painkillers, all under Thrawn’s watchful eyes. The agent was doing much better now, which was a relief as he was responsible for Kallus’ well being. Thrawn felt like he had a good relationship with the ISB, but he didn’t want to push his luck.

There was a radiant glow to Kallus now, just like there had been with Vanto. It was the result of the chemicals, sure, but Thrawn found himself liking Kallus despite the manipulation that his body couldn’t resist. He’d held himself back from just jumping the agent multiple times, especially when Kallus was giving a report on the rebels, unconscious of the infared halos around them that told any Chiss that they were ready, desperate, and wanting. Thrawn was desperate and he was sure that instinct would take over the next time he saw the agent.

The blue mark on his chest covering his pectorals was the exact shade of Thrawn’s skin. He’d placed his hand against Kallus’ chest, the agent sighing at the the cool relief, and he couldn’t tell where he ended and the agent began. Such a strange and enticing reaction. There had been opportunities to do things to the agent but Thrawn resisted the urge. He wanted Kallus to remember.

Gods. He either needed a drink or to punch the circuits out of some droids. He decided to go with the latter and got as far as changing his clothing until he was interrupted by the sound at someone at his door.

“Yes?” Thrawn said as he opened the door, stepping back in surprise as Agent Kallus stumbled over the threshold, shirtless and disheveled. His gaze went right to blue splotch on his chest and he dug his nail into his palms in an effort to resist claiming Kallus right there and then. The door slid shut and Thrawn hoped that anyone who had seen Kallus on the hallway security footage would mind their own damn business.

“I didn’t thank you, Gran-miral. You didn’t need to care for me like that.” Kallus slurred his title, his pupils dilated wide as he approached Thrawn and placed his hands on his shoulders. “I have to thank you.”

Thrawn knew right there and then and closed the gap between them, his hands going to cup Kallus’ face. His face was hot, his facial hair softer than Thrawn had expected.

“That feels good.” Kallus’ eyes fluttered closed, enjoying the cold of Thrawn’s skin. “Please…”

Cold lips pressed against hot ones that parted so easily, so nicely for him. The sounds the agent made were so delicious, his mouth still tasting of the re-hydrating beverage, salty and sweet at the same time. Thrawn was glad this was happening. Sure, he loved teasing the agent but this was much, much more satisfying. Hot hands gripped at his shirt, tugging it upwards and Thrawn broke the kiss to allow it to be slid over his head and dropped to the ground unceremoniously. He took the opportunity to look Kallus over, his hands moving from his face to his waist. The agent was a disheveled mess, face and mouth glowing hot in the infrared, lips swollen and wet and parted slightly as he panted.

“I’ve been wanting that ever since you arrived.”

“Then why didn’t you?”   
  
“Self-control.” Which he had less and less of with ever second that passed.

He lifted Kallus up, the agent wrapping his legs tightly around his waist, that hot bulge in his pants rubbing deliciously against Thrawn as he carried him to the bedroom. They kissed again, not separating even as Thrawn laid Kallus on the bed kneeling over him, running his hands over every inch of his muscular chest. The agent’s hands were everywhere too, short nails digging just right into his skin, making him curse in Sy Bisti. Thrawn ground his hips down, eliciting a keening gasp from the agent and a begging trio of pleases. Thrawn broke the kiss, catching his breath, his shoulders heaving with the effort of restraint and care.

Humans were much more delicate than Chiss were. He’d learned that with Vanto. That being said, Kallus was not Vanto. He wasn’t short like Vanto was; they were nearly the same height. Thrawn would hardly break him. But a little too much pressure in the wrong place and Thrawn could easily snap a bone. Kallus didn’t need to be put through more agony.

“I was the only one to picked for this because I was the only one who wanted this.” Kallus panted, digging his nails into Thrawn’s shoulders and dragging them down slowly. “Ever since I heard of you… I could only dream of an opportunity like this.”

“You must be feeling better.” Thrawn mumbled into Kallus’ shoulder, nipping at the soft skin and leaving little marks that made the agent gasp.

“Either that or I’m just distracted enough.”

Pants and underclothes fell to the floor as Thrawn undressed fully and then tugged off Kallus’ pants, nearly tearing off his underwear. Kallus was a mess, skin flushed and sweaty, brown eyes roving all over his body in search of something.

“I am from a warrior race.” Thrawn ran a hand down his abdomen, pressing his fingers against the slit between his legs, widening it so the tendril within could be freed to wrap around Kallus’ cock. “And we keep our genitalia on the inside where it belongs.”

Kallus made a keening sound of delight, his face becoming hotter than Thrawn thought was possible as he writhed in absolute delight at the feeling of something slippery and hot wrapped around him. He was blissed out, all rational thought leaving his mind as he focused on the feeling of Thrawn around him, the strong muscle rippling and touching him in all the right ways.   
  
“I always wondered-“ Kallus gasped. “What you had down there.”

“And is it acceptable?” Thrawn mumbled into the agent’s neck, kissing at that vulnerable spot where he could feel the human’s pulse pounding.

“Fuck, yes it is.” Kallus cursed.

“Then you’ll like this part even better.” He gripped Kallus’ shoulders and carefully lowered himself onto that cock, the tendril guiding it smoothly within him.

Kallus let loose a series of curses rude enough to make Thrawn quirk an eyebrow at him. “I-I didn’t think you were going to do that too.”

“This is how it works.” He closed his eyes, carefully adjusting his weight upon the human, not wanting him to crush him or cause any discomfort.

“You’re fine,” said Kallus, “you’re not going to hurt me. Please…”

“That is not true, Kallus.” Saying just the agent’s name felt strange on his tongue, but he wanted to make his point clear. “I must be careful with you.”

Kallus opened his mouth to say something else but Thrawn silenced him with another hungry kiss and a careful moment of his hips that made the human absolutely shudder underneath him. Thrawn was absolutely dripping now, each movement slick and easy and delightful. It had been much too long since he’d had a human, not since Vanto had he done this or felt the overwhelming need to. It was an odd situation. This wasn’t out of love or mutual respect but desperation and manipulation. That wasn’t bad, but it wasn’t the same and maybe that was better. He couldn’t love another again like he loved Vanto and risk that heartbreak and fear of the Empire taking them from him or warping their personality from what it had been, like what it did to Thrawn. This was different.

Thrawn shifted slightly again until he was at an angle where when he closed his eyes, he saw star lines. He was gripping the bed now, hands carefully away from Kallus. He didn’t want to dislocate a shoulder like he had once. That had been most unpleasant. His breathing was hot and heavy now and he opened his eyes to see an absolutely desperate looking Kallus and decided what the hell and withdrew his tendril, sending a shudder absolutely rippling through Kallus’ body. The agent looked confused, opening his mouth to say something but shut it again as Thrawn carefully switched their positions, his hands gentle on Kallus’ hips as he maneuvered the other.

He felt his face color purple and looked away, feeling extremely vulnerable in the moment. “Do what you humans are so good at.”

“I won’t last much longer.” Kallus warned him, his voice raspy.

“I too am close to falling apart.” He moved his hands from the agent’s hips and forced himself to relax. “We will make the most of it.”

Kallus started to move his hips then, pulling out nearly all the way which had Thrawn clawing at the sheets until he slammed back in and made an absolutely desperate sound slip out of his mouth. The pace wasn’t quite as punishing as Thrawn would have preferred but it was only the first time with the agent and he didn’t want to be too demanding, though he felt that Kallus would happily follow any of his orders in this matter. He moved slightly until he saw stars again, his hands clutching at Kallus’ hips to keep him right there as his release rippled through his body. He could feel Kallus’s release just a moment later, hot jets of liquid that were nearly painful but he didn’t complain, letting go of Kallus’ hips once the human had finished, knowing that there’d be hand-shaped bruises that would appear later.

Kallus said something in a language that Thrawn didn’t understand as he pulled out, a gush of fluid following him. Thrawn shuddered at the sudden emptiness as Kallus settled down next to him, the human panting and spent.

“What did you say?” Asked Thrawn once he’d remembered how to speak Basic.

“Nothing that I could translate in a meaningful way.” Kallus settled next to him, panting.

“I am familiar with that particular issue.” Thrawn said. “What do you typically do next?”

“Sleep or shower or shamefully return to my quarters to never speak of it again.”

“There’s no shame in this, Agent Kallus.” Thrawn turned to look at the human who immediately went red again.

“You said ‘typically’ and that’s what I usually do. Especially when they’re an alien and the Empire is no big fan of that.” Kallus mumbled the second sentence.

“Then all of this must come as a relief to you. There’s no need for you to leave and I would be quite disappointed if you did.” He pressed his hand against Kallus’ chest, enjoying the man’s rapid heartbeat.

“I wouldn’t want to disappoint you, sir.” Kallus smiled. “Though I do have questions about the boundaries of our relationship.”

That was a good question and Thrawn was thankful that Kallus had asked it. He hadn’t understood why Vanto wanted to be discreet until the man had plainly explained that the Empire did not like different species relationships and even if Thrawn was the best officer they had, they would still find ways to go against them. Besides that, Vanto was of a lower rank and that would be seen as taking advantage of him. There was much to think about. Kallus was a different case however.

“What boundaries do you require?” Thrawn asked.

“None,” replied Kallus. “Again, this is up to you, sir. I will just do as you ask.”

Thrawn studied Kallus’ face, searching for any sign that he might be hiding something. He wasn’t. The agent’s face was open and eager without a sign of deception.

“I have broken bones in the throes of passion, so you must tell me if I’m hurting you.”

“Of course.” Kallus agreed without complaint.

“We must be discreet. There are some notorious gossips on the _Chimera_ who would love to hear about a change in my personal life.”

Kallus smiled at that. “I understand, sir.”

“You may call me Thrawn.”

Kallus licked his lips, face flushing again. “Yes... Thrawn.”

“Am I able to take you?”

“I would love that, Thrawn. I just need additional preparation.”

“I know,” Thrawn said. “How about a shower, then?”

“Absolutely.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the gossips are Faro and Hammerly. we all know it. 
> 
> wow is it hot in here or is it just those two? both? yeah? 
> 
> uhhhh comments and kudos keep me alive during this terrible time in the whole world so (finger guns)


	4. Kallus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thrawn skips out on his duties to spend more time with Kallus. Kallus shows off some new skills.

Kallus woke up the next morning. He hoped it was morning because his room was really dim for some reason and he hoped that he hadn’t overslept, or under slept for that matter. He smacked his hand against the wall in an attempt to find the toggle for the lights and managed to get them up to a much brighter level. The blue expanse of a person on the other side of his bed hissed and it all came flooding back to him.  
  
“Do you mind?” A terse pillow muffled voice said.  
  
“Kriff- sorry, Grand Ad- Thrawn.” He slammed the lights off again and sat up, burying his face in his hands in absolute mortification. The amount of blood rushing to his face was bound to change his skin tone permanently.

“If you insist on being awake, can you find me my comlink?” Thrawn asked, not moving from his (admittedly comfortable looking) position.

“Yes, of course.”

Where were their comms? Did he even bring his over when he had stumbled into Thrawn’s quarters like a desperate teenager? Kallus slipped out from under the covers and shivered at the temperature of the room. Thrawn kept his quarters way colder than Kallus did. Though Kallus was naked so that didn’t help much. Kallus dug through Thrawn’s discarded pants and found his comm which was vibrating hard enough to be considered a sex toy with the amount of messages he was getting.

“Here,” Kallus said, placing the comm in Thrawn’s outstretched hand. “Should I leave?”

“No. Come back to bed. You’re cold.” Thrawn was now on his side with one eye open in a slight glowing slit as he scrolled through his comm, the vibrations slowing down as he responded to the crew. “I’ll warm you up.”

Kallus gratefully returned under the covers, settling a polite distance away from Thrawn. He wasn’t sure how Thrawn planned to warm him up, being as he was a cold being. A warm leg hooked around his waist bringing Kallus to rest flush against him. The man was now hot, Kallus realized in absolute bewilderment and wondered why Thrawn hadn’t been like that before.

“Temperature regulation,” said Thrawn by way of explanation, still scrolling though his comm.

“Neat trick,” said Kallus as he ran his knuckles down Thrawn’s spine.

“Yes. Thrawn here.” Thrawn’s voice changed to the flat emotionless one that Kallus was so used to hearing which, in turn, made him realize how relaxed Thrawn had really been around him to drop part of his facade.

“I haven’t gotten through all my messages yet. No. No. I hadn’t heard that. Agent Kallus? Yes. He’s doing much better. No. Just a virus. Contagious?” Thrawn raised an eyebrow at Kallus, a soft smile on his face. “Oh, I’m afraid so. Yes. Not necessary to relay to Imperial Center. I will be fine. I just need to rest. Tomorrow. We will both be better by then. Of course. Thank you, Faro. My ship is in your capable hands.”

Thrawn clicked off his comm and tossed it off the side of the bed, tangling his hands in Kallus’ hair and pressing himself against the other man.

Kallus blinked, taken aback by what had just occurred. “Did you just… fake sick so you didn’t have to do anything today?”

“I fear,” Thrawn said softly, kissing at the agent’s neck. “That after today the both of us will be not seeing each other for quite some time.”

Kallus stiffened, a pang of disappointment piercing his chest. “Why’s that? How long do we have?”

“I will be going to Imperial Center to meet with the Emperor. You will be going to a station in orbit around Geonosis to lay a trap for our rebel friends.”

“No rest for the weary, I guess.” Kallus said carefully. He didn’t want to leave Thrawn’s side but he did want to catch those rebels. At least they had the rest of the day to enjoy each other.

“Orders are orders,” Thrawn agreed. “But at least we can continue with your standing order.”

“That’s generous of you, sir.”

Kallus could feel Thrawn smile against his shoulder. “It is.” 

Thrawn pulled away from him and slipped out of the bed. “Get dressed. We should eat.”

He couldn’t keep his eyes off that wonderful blue muscular back as Thrawn scooped up three articles of clothing and disappeared into the refresher. Kallus stared at the ceiling, unable to suppress a huge smile. Gods, he was lucky. He’d have to make up something when he reported to Yularen at some point. And last night? That had been the best sex in his life. Especially when Thrawn totally wrecked him in the shower. That had been beyond anything ever.

“Get your mind out of the gutter, Agent Kallus. I can’t tear your clothes off if you aren’t wearing any.”

That made Kallus sit up real fast, nearly choking on air, but was smacked in the face by soft clothing. Thrawn was gone by the time he got the clothes off his face and so he grumbled and headed to the refresher. 

-

They sat across from each other at the small table. Kallus poked at his ration of grey goop, wishing he was on a planet with actual food and not just… whatever this was. Thrawn was eating it dutifully, but he was staring at Kallus’ chest and probably not thinking about scheduled meal times. Thrawn’s shirt said ‘ISB’ in big white letters and Kallus wondered how he’d gotten that one. Yularen, probably. Kallus’ shirt said ‘Pantora’. This shirt and its origins was also a total mystery (though the tag had said that it was made on Corellia).

Faro had personally delivered the rations and a new comlink for Kallus which had provoked Faro to ask a bunch of questions as she tried to peek around Thrawn’s body that was squarely wedged in the gap and then remarking on the violet hue to his face to which Thrawn responded, “Would you like to see me actually vomit.” Faro had apologized and left, but didn’t seem to be in a bad humor about the incident at all. Kallus had burst into laughter as soon as she had gone and Thrawn had tossed him the comlink, a slight smile on his face.

Now they were both caught up on what their new missions were and Thrawn seemed more pensive about his than usual. That being said, being called to Imperial Center was always a big deal. And meeting with the Emperor himself? Forget about it. Kallus was more than happy to _not_ be involved with that.

“Are you nervous about your meeting?” Kallus asked as he finished his ration.

“It’s best to not think too hard about it.”

“Have you met him before?”

“Yes. It’s an… experience.” Thrawn took their dishes and put them straight into the trash. “Let’s not speak of this.”

Kallus understood. Being part of the ISB, it was probably bugged to hell out here and there were always red flag words that would warrant an investigation and that wasn’t something that either of them needed. Besides, Thrawn was scooping him out of the chair and all that was on Kallus’ mind now was high cheekbones and good dick. If they weren’t going to see each other, having just made it this far and being extremely compatible, it made sense to make the most of the time they had. At least they were on the same page.

Clothes came off much faster this time, Kallus desperately clawing at Thrawn’s back as soon as it was exposed. Thrawn was still running hot as he bruised Kallus’ collarbone with a mix of tongue and teeth, gasps and murmured praises slipping from Kallus’ lips as he arched his back, desperate for more. He gasped as Thrawn straddled his hips, the tendril guiding his cock into warmth and wetness and tight muscle. Thrawn’s hair fell into his face as he leaned forward to kiss Kallus, making him look younger somehow or at least more relaxed. Kallus had no idea what age Thrawn was and he really didn’t care. He’d drop to his knees anytime for this man.

“This is the best way to keep someone from poking around in your mind, Agent Kallus. If you encounter that blind Jedi, just think of this.”

Thrawn twisted his hips in a delightful way that had Kallus keening louder than he had before, immediately pushing a hand to his face in total mortification. Thrawn laughed quietly, his head tilting as if he was listening to something, his movements slow and teasing.

“What- what is it?” Kallus managed, feeling absolutely tortured by the slow, deliberate ripple of muscle pushing him ever closer to the edge.

“There’s a squad of troopers passing by. Do try to be quiet, Agent Kallus.”

And of course Thrawn did that same thing with his hips and Kallus screamed internally, biting his hand hard, thankful that gloves were a part of his uniform because that was going to leave a mark.

“Pryce was supposed to speak with me today.”

Kallus’ eyebrows shot up and he managed to hiss out, “You blew off Pryce.”

“Yes.”  
  
“She’s going to be furious with you.”

“Yes. And you won’t be available for her to talk to either. Doubly angry at the both of us.” His head tilted in the opposite direction. “How fast do you think you could hide?”  
  
“Hide?” The word was barely out of his mouth as Thrawn slid off of him and he had to bite back an extremely desperate sound at the loss of sensation.

“If need be. I think you’ll be fine if you stay right there and be entirely silent.” He was dressed in about a second flat which made Kallus think that he had some experience with this situation. “I’ll be right back.”

Kallus pulled the covers over his head rolling his eyes at the absurdity of the situation and the needless risk of it all. He listened carefully and sure enough, that was Pryce’s voice complaining about something and then Thrawn’s voice, low and slightly hoarse as if he’d been vomiting as he implied to Faro. Pryce again with some more complaints. Thrawn’s voice was tense and Kallus could imagine how Thrawn’s eyes were narrowed, his face still flushed violet as he explained that no, he wasn’t available and that, yes, tomorrow he’d be on Imperial Center and that, no, she wasn’t requested to be there. Then there was a low growl of a Death Trooper requesting that Pryce leave and let the Grand Admiral rest. The door closed soon after that and Kallus only dared to peek his head out when he felt Thrawn slip under the sheets and settle over him, his skin back to being cold.

“I believe the inside-out shirt really sold it.”

Kallus had to grin at that. “I’m certain it did.”

“That woman…” Thrawn didn’t finish his sentence as he was busy engulfing Kallus’ cock, his hips rocking much harder than they had previously.

The agent wanted to say more but he was too busy enjoying Thrawn’s pace and the feeling of his nails running down his rib cage digging just deep enough into his skin that Kallus squirmed and moaned quietly, hoping to gods that no one else was passing by Thrawn’s quarters. Thrawn was slicker then before and Kallus wondered if the threat of getting caught had only added to that. From the look in those glowing eyes, he was inclined to believe his thought was correct. Kallus tangled his hands in Thrawn’s silky hair, hoping that he’d be able to touch him again soon and that neither of them would die in service to the Empire. He doubted it but he still crushed his lips against Thrawn’s, moaning curses into his skin as he came again, that same refreshing cold wetness washing over him as Thrawn’s hips slowly stilled.

“I could do this all all day, Agent Kallus.”

“I know.”

“And I will do it all day, if you’ll allow me.”

“I will, I just need to rest. Just for a minute.” Kallus gave a shuddering sigh as Thrawn lifted off of him and settled down next to him.

“Have some water.”

Kallus accepted the bottle from Thrawn and chugged down half of it. He felt Thrawn’s eyes watching his throat (which felt sore and covered with marks) as he swallowed. He offered the water back to Thrawn who finished the rest of it and dropped the empty container to the floor. 

“Thanks.” He took a few deep breaths, trying unsuccessfully to slow his heart rate. As soon as he got calmer, Thrawn placed a cool hand on his chest and the whole process started over. Kallus gave up. His heart would just be racing when he was with Thrawn. The man probably was doing it on purpose. (Only a little bit.)

Kallus thought for a little bit about what he wanted to do next. He had thought a little too long when impatient fingernails dug a little too hard into his still sore chest. Kallus hissed slightly at that and met Thrawn’s expectant gaze.

“I am a patient man, Kallus, but we don’t have nearly enough time.”

Kallus moved to be between Thrawn’s legs, the other man anticipating his movements and hooking a leg over Kallus’ shoulder. Kallus looked up to see indigo-flushed cheeks and a small smile of approval. Encouraged, he lowered his head to lick at that slit. The shudder that ran though Thrawn’s body at just that, his tongue barely dipping into him, hips tense under his hands. Thrawn said something in a language that Kallus didn’t know, his hands fisting into his hair. He continued licking slowly, quiet curses (Kallus assumed) almost melodic to his ears as his tongue was deep enough to touch the tip of the tendril. Kallus lingered there and relaxed his jaw. He wasn’t sure if Thrawn had control over it or if it was a reflex sort of thing but he wasn’t going to stop this and ask for an anatomy lesson. Not with Thrawn so undone and relaxed like he was sure only a very small handful of people had seen him like.

“Come on...” Thrawn murmured in Basic now, tugging Kallus’ hair.

He pressed his tongue against it and must have hit something in the right way. As Thrawn arched his hips off the bed, the tendril slid slowly into his mouth. It was cold and smooth and didn’t taste half bad at all. That week long training was going to come in handy as he didn’t know how long Thrawn was, but that didn’t matter as his gag reflex had been totally removed. It helped that it was flexible, matching the contours of his mouth as it pressed towards his throat. Kallus kept his breathing even and slow and looked up at Thrawn through his eyelashes. The Chiss had a look of unguarded amazement on his face, eyes glowing brightly enough to color the skin around his eyes purple.

He was drooling but that was much less offensive than gagging and it could only be expected when one’s mouth was this full. The tendril seemed to have stopped at this point. Kallus wasn’t sure if that was the entire length or if Thrawn still didn’t want to hurt him. He swallowed slightly and felt another shudder run through Thrawn’s body, a string of harsh words that Kallus didn’t understand following soon after. Kallus adjusted his angle slightly, feeling Thrawn deeper in his throat than he’d ever felt anything before. He swallowed again, the shudders running more rapidly through Thrawn’s body. Kallus rubbed at his hips with his thumbs hoping that he conveyed the words that he couldn’t say, that it was fine, that he could take it.

When Thrawn came, it was his turn to shudder as wave after wave of comparatively cold liquid shot down his throat. He slowly eased off the tendril, a deep ache in his throat and jaw beginning to form. It was a satisfying feeling though and Kallus was more than a little proud of himself. Thrawn’s leg slipped off of him as Kallus sat upright and wiped at his mouth.

“Was that good?” Kallus asked and then winced, a hand to his throat. “Ouch.”

“I take it I won’t be getting a repeat performance of that today?” Thrawn still looked utterly delighted.

“Unfortunately,” Kallus coughed slightly. “The right angle would need to be found and I would love that except I still need to be able to talk tomorrow.”

“A shame.” Thrawn slipped out of the bed again. “Would tea help?”

“With honey, if you have it.” He licked his lips, his voice cracking as he tried to speak louder. “But don’t bother if it’s not real honey from an insect.”

“I am a Grand Admiral, Kallus. Of course I have real honey.”

“And yet you still eat those awful rations.”

Kallus collapsed back onto the bed, closing his eyes as he listened to Thrawn move around in the kitchen. He felt absolutely in bliss. No blind Jedi or his irritating apprentice would be able to get through the layer of sexual memories he had now, which made him feel a little better about the days to come. At least something pleasant to think of, at the very least.

“Here,” said Thrawn, pressing a warm mug into his hands. “It’s not too hot and it is mostly honey.”

Kallus took a small sip and sighed at the sweetness. His throat felt much better already. “Thank you.”

“I think that’s enough for today, Agent Kallus.”

Kallus wanted to protest but his body was aching in odd places and Thrawn was probably right. Besides, nothing could possibly surpass what he had just done.

“As you wish, Grand Admiral.” Kallus hesitated. “Should I leave now?”

“I will tell you when you need to leave and not a moment sooner. We both should rest. You’re still in recovery from that whole incident, after all.”

Kallus nodded. Thrawn didn’t say it in so many words but he could tell the underlying meaning was that he was tired as well from caring for Kallus. He was still grateful for that. There had been no reason for Thrawn to do anything for him and yet he had made sure that Kallus was cared for.

What a strange Imperial Thrawn made.

He looked over at the man who was back on his commlink, eyes rapidly scanning over missed messages and typing out responses. Kallus smiled into his tea as Thrawn started mumbling about his messages, giving Kallus a little insight into his life.

“There’s a loose loth-cat… Why do I get these messages? Who brought one of those creatures on my ship?”  
  
“In all fairness, I believe I received that message too. What’s the latest?”  
  
“Faro says she was bitten in mess hall 2030A. Engineering reports chewed cables and a power outage on deck 4000. Trooper 6327 says that the loth-cat was white and now there’s much discussion about how loth-cats are not white, but usually more striped to blend in with the grasses of Lothal.”  
  
“Fascinating stuff,” said Kallus, finishing off his tea and feeling much better about his whole situation.

“Hm,” said Thrawn.

“What?”

“This is your comm. Here.” Thrawn took the mug from him and passed the comm over. “No wonder I wasn’t seeing anything relevant. I only responded to some of them.”

Kallus sighed and began to look at what Thrawn had said. The words sent from his comm were distinctively Thrawn’s. So much for keeping this on the down low. There would be gossip. At least tomorrow they’d be in totally different areas of the galaxy. He still wasn’t happy about that.

“Yes. This one’s mine.” Thrawn had found his comm on the floor and was back to it. “No loth-cat messages here.”

“If only I was so lucky.” Kallus grumbled.

Thrawn had responded to one of the messages about loth-cat coloring expressing that it might be a mutation and ought to be caught and studied (something Kallus would never say) and now Kallus would be getting notifications from that particular thread until it was shut down by communications. The rest were general enough that Kallus wasn’t concerned until he saw a message to Faro asking if she’d seen the newest installation on level 6000 by the turbolifts and whether she thought that location was better than the observation decks. Kallus started to type an excuse for why he would say something like that but three messages from her came through in quick succession.

_Thrawn?_

_Agent Kallus is with you, isn’t he?_

_Hammerly owes me 50 creds now._

“You should go,” Thrawn said quietly, looking up from his comm. “Faro has questions that I need to clarify about our return to Imperial Center. Ones better answered in person.”

“I understand, sir.”

Thrawn leaned over and kissed him so gently that Kallus held his breath, not wanting to shatter the moment.

“We will see each other very soon.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay now go read the book with Thrawn and Vader and the ep where Kallus gets stranded with Zeb because that is where we are in the timeline. generally. 
> 
> hoped you loved all of that because I sure as hell did. 
> 
> yes the white loth-cat did get on the ship and is happily eating all of the fish out of an aquarium on observation deck 5. you won't catch it so don't even try. 
> 
> have a nice Monday.


	5. Kallus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kallus, shaken by recent events, is having a bad time. Thrawn buys him a drink.

When he met Thrawn again, it was not under the ideal circumstances that Kallus had hoped for.

Everything that had happened at Geonosis and then on Bahryn had shaken his faith in the Empire. A _Lasat_ had cared for him, hadn’t murdered him outright like he probably deserved, and now there was a persistent burning feeling of bile in the back of his throat. His perspective had been shaken and he found himself crying at night in guilt of the terrible acts he’d committed. He’d been moved to the Imperial Complex on Lothal where he was convalescing, his leg in a bacta cast. The break had been exceptionally bad and was healing ever so slowly. At least his room had a view. He could look outside and wonder if the Spectres were down in Capital City, stealing meilooruns and causing trouble. He wondered what Zeb was doing and if the Lasat thought about Kallus as much as he did.

There was a polite knock at his door and Kallus wiped at his eyes, hoping that it wasn’t too obvious that he’d been crying, and tried to sit up a little more, hoping that he didn’t look as terrible as he felt.

“Come in,” he called.

“Agent Kallus,” came that smooth voice that Kallus had missed so badly. “You got yourself into quite a mess while I was gone.”

“Grand Admiral.” Kallus said, his voice raspy from disuse and more crying than he would ever care to admit.

Thrawn entered the room, locking the door behind him, tall and resplendent in his whites, aslight look of concern on his face as he surveyed Kallus’s immobile leg. He rolled the chair from the desk and sat down by Kallus’ side.   
  
“Faro relayed news of your injury and I came as soon as I could.”

Which hadn’t been very soon at all, seeing as he’d been like this for few weeks.

“I am sorry that it couldn’t be sooner.”

That made him feel slightly better.

“Faro said that Lord Vader was with you?”

Thrawn inclined his head. “Yes. It was an interesting mission.”

“Thrawn…” He met the man’s gaze as he asked a hard question that had been weighing on him. “How do you know if you’re doing the right thing?”

“The right thing is always subjective.” Thrawn had responded slowly and Kallus could tell he was taking him seriously and really thinking it over. “What is right to one group of beings may be wrong to another. That is the way of things.”   
  
“But what if it’s something universally acknowledged to be wrong?” His voice cracked again and he looked away from Thrawn, willing him to not see the guilt that he carried. “Forgive me. You don’t need to be burdened with all of this that’s going though my head.”

“You are a warrior, Kallus, and all warriors carry heavy burdens.” Thrawn said something else in a different language but didn’t translate. “Are you able to walk?”

“More or less.” He’d been using the bo-rifle as a crutch, not willing to let it leave his side after Bahryn and not wanting to be without a defense. “What do you have in mind?”

“You need a drink.”

Kallus laughed. Thrawn was perceptive in a badly needed way. “Yes. Yes, I do.”

-

They met up later on the ground level. Kallus had changed into black fatigues which didn’t look too Imperial. Thrawn was dressed in a casual robe and looked all for the world like a Pantorian, dark glasses covering up his red eyes. The agent limped over to him and leaned on his bo-rifle.

“Nice glasses.”

“It has worked before.” 

“That’s a relief.”

It was hot and slightly humid out and even despite that, Kallus felt himself relaxing a bit more. He’d really been stuck inside for too long. The two of them blended into the crowds well enough. Thrawn still stuck out with his militant posture, but at least his eyes weren’t dramatic. He kept his hand at the small of Kallus’ back gently guiding him though the crowds, patiently keeping pace with his stiff and slow movement.

“We’re nearly there,” Thrawn said as Kallus stumbled slightly. “Here.”   
  
_The Loth-Wolf,_ read a flickering neon sign that was barely visible in the late-afternoon brightness. Kallus followed Thrawn inside, surprised that it was one of the few remaining non-Imperialized cantinas. It did make sense as they appeared to be a couple of differing species. That alone would almost certainly get them kicked out of an Imperial bar. Kallus sighed with relief as he sat in the booth and rested his bo-rifle carefully against the table, mostly out of view.

“Stay here. I’ll get our drinks.”

Thrawn boldly kissed him on the lips, a thumb brushing over his jaw before he left the table. Kallus looked around, feeling his face flush. No one had even given them a second glance. They were just another couple in a bar, enjoying the end of the day. Kallus wondered what life would be like if they were just beings without rank and without dedication to some grand cause. He could see himself as a farmer or maybe a smuggler. Thrawn though… Thrawn was a warrior through and through. Kallus couldn’t think of him as anything other than that.

Was Thrawn even thinking of the two of them as a couple? Gods, he need a drink. He was thinking much too hard about all of this.

“You’re thinking too much.” Thrawn sat next to him, his body warm even through his robe. He slid a glass to Kallus that was extremely tall and filled with a myriad of colored liquids. Whatever Thrawn had was fizzing and the same color of his eyes.

“Cheers,” said Kallus, clinking his glass against Thrawn’s before taking a tentative sip.

His eyes widened at the surprisingly sweet and pleasant taste and he drank some more until a low and teasing voice told him to slow down. He did, feeling a goofy smile spread across his face as his thoughts finally slowed down to a crawl and he focused on the atmosphere of room, the smattering of different languages, the various different species in the room, and the graffiti covering the walls (which Thrawn kept looking at). Kallus saw a Twi’lek couple across the room cuddling up with each other and he leaned against Thrawn, pleased when he wasn’t pushed away. Thrawn’s arm came to rest around his shoulders in such a comforting manner that the pain in Kallus’ leg nearly vanished.

Glasses piled up in front of them as Thrawn told him about what had happened on his mission, his voice low enough that just Kallus could hear him. It was fascinating to hear what had happened, fleshed out more than just a few messages from Faro with vague things like _saw another Chiss today_ and _you know who is absolutely terrifying_ and _some real bad beings out there._

“These Grysk are that deep into the Empire? How do we not know about them?” 

“That’s a different story with other ramifications that you would find just as… concerning as I do.”

“Huh,” said Kallus, his mind reeling from the implications of everything Thrawn had told him.

“That’s why I am pushing for the manufacture of TIE Defenders on Lothal. Though there has been some issues with manufacturing other Imperial equipment that will need to be looked into.”

TIE Defenders… Kallus recalled seeing a demonstration of one. It was a TIE, sure, but without all the disadvantages that made them so easily destroyable. If they were effective against these Grysk, he couldn’t imagine what they could do to the Rebels if enough of them were manufactured.

“What was it like seeing your people again?” Kallus asked, wanting to steer the conversation away from the internal struggle he was having with this new information.

Thrawn finished his drink and pushed the glass forward to join the others. “It was difficult.”

Kallus felt like Thrawn was understating his feelings from the way his body tensed. “I don’t know what I’d do in that situation.”

“Well, it did help that there was a man who could have killed me through the power of his mind alone.”

“That’ll certainly keep your priorities straight.” Kallus laughed, closing his eyes as Thrawn pressed kisses against his wrist.

When he opened them again, he made eye contact with a human across the room who had the silver eyes of the blind but who was looking right at him. There was a cold breeze at Kallus’ neck as the man nodded deliberately at him before placing a cred chip on the table and leaving.

There was no way. That had to be Kanan Jarrus.

Kallus stood up quickly, his head spinning as he wedged his bo-rifle under his arm.

“Is something the matter, Kallus?”

“I just need some fresh air. I’ll be back.”

He hoped Thrawn had been distracted enough by kissing him that he hadn’t noticed that strange moment. Kallus hobbled as quickly as he could out into the warm night air, searching for the Jedi. He heard a strange sound like a single note of an ethereal song. Trancelike, he found himself walking a few buildings down and into an alley. It was Kanan Jarus, just standing there, the light of Lothal’s moons hitting him in a way that made him look otherworldly.

“The Force lead me here, Agent Kallus. I wonder why.”

“Is it just you?” Kallus asked, looking around for that Mandalorian girl or the annoying Jedi kid. Zeb clearly wasn’t here, but he still braced himself for someone to leap at him at any second.

“Yes. I mean Hera drove me here but she’s not here right now.” Kanan shook his head as if he was trying to keep himself on track. “Zeb said to thank you for not shooting him and he hopes that you’re feeling better.”

“Tell him that I’ve been thinking about what he said about asking questions.” Kallus closed his eyes, thinking of the right words. “Tell him that I’m afraid to face the truth.”

“I’ll tell him that.” Kanan paused. “Was that…”

  
  
“Yes, that was Thrawn with me.”

“That must be an interesting story.”

  
  
Kallus couldn’t help but smile at that. “Yeah. Maybe you’ll get to hear it one day.”

“I hope so.”

The agent opened his eyes to see Kanan turn away from him and vanish into the dark. Somehow, he felt lighter and heavier at the same time. If he turned down this path, there was no going back and a little part of him felt like that would be okay, even if it meant losing everything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> splitting this chapter here because it actually felt like a better chapter end point. 
> 
> getting into some of that heavy stuff 
> 
> Hera picks up Kanan and it's gossip all the way back to the Ghost and Zeb is like, "He didn't mention that he was involved with Thrawn." and it's a whole thing. 
> 
> anyways happy Tuesday. this might be updated daily until I finish it but no promises. have a good one.


	6. Kallus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kallus ponders some hard choices and learns some uncomfortable truths.

His comm buzzed insistently at him and Kallus answered it as he limped back to _The Loth-Wolf_.

“Agent? Are you alright?”

“I’m fine. I just needed to stretch my legs.”

Kallus ended the call as he entered the bar again and made his way back to Thrawn. He settled next to him and finished off the last of his drink. He found himself staring at Thrawn as a sudden wave of intoxication and desire swept over him. If it weren’t for the alcohol, he’d be thinking way too hard again, especially with what had just happened and how he was teetering on the edge of treason.

“You wanna get out of here?” he asked.

Thrawn’s response sent a shiver up his spine. “I thought you’d never ask.”

The stack of credits that Thrawn had left had been more than generous and stuck out in Kallus’ mind in the haze of different thoughts racing though his head as they made their way back to the Imperial Complex. Fucking Thrawn wasn’t treasonous. If anything, it was whatever the opposite of treason was. It was his patriotic duty to the Empire to be involved in this relationship and as long as he kept thinking about that, there was no way anyone could accuse him. Besides, it had been his original mission (though in not so many words; he’d eagerly announced that he would go for the seduction route and ISB Command had mostly just shrugged and gone with it as no one was brave enough to face the absurdly perceptive alien.)

_Would a Rebel do this?_ He thought as he pressed himself against Thrawn in the turbolift, managing to get a few hungry kisses in before they had to compose themselves enough for the hallway security cameras. The hallway was thankfully devoid of any humans or droids but they still had to be somewhat composed in case someone did come by. Kallus realized with some relief that they were at Thrawn’s quarters. His room was smaller than what he had gotten on the _Chimera_ and, belated, he wondered if that had been Thrawn’s manipulation that had put him right across from the Grand Admiral. (It had been).

The bo-rifle was the only object to be discarded carefully as they desperately tore at each other’s clothing. Kallus kicked off a boot with so much enthusiasm that it hit a holo-sculpture and shorted it out. This made Thrawn grin and then Kallus found out (with no small amount of delight) that Thrawn hadn’t been wearing much under his robe at all, evidently having planned for this to be the conclusion of their evening. Kallus hadn’t been so forward thinking and suffered the consequences, groaning in frustration as Thrawn slowly, slowly peeled his clothes off.

“What is the best way to do this?” Thrawn asked as they finally made it to the bed. “I do not wish to further injure your leg.”

“You’re the smart and creative one,” Kallus said, collapsing onto the bed with a sigh of relief. “You figure it out.”

Of course then Thrawn just stood there, a pensive hand at his face, his eyes glowing brightly as he thought about it.

“Oh, karrabast, sir,” Kallus swore. “Just do something.”

That finally got Thrawn moving to crouch over him, carefully avoiding his injured leg. “What does that mean?”   
  
“I have no idea, honestly.” Kallus admitted.

“Vanto would have known.”

_Vanto_. Thrawn had mentioned _Vanto_ and Kallus wanted to ask more but could only moan as Thrawn positioned himself oh so carefully, that tendril wrapping around his cock as Thrawn carefully situated himself, glowing eyes cast downwards as he avoided putting any weight on Kallus’ right leg and, for that matter, hardly any weight on him at all. Kallus marveled at Thrawn’s athleticism and ran his hands down the man’s sides, feeling strong muscle flex beneath his fingers.

Kallus was already seeing stars and Thrawn wasn’t hardly moving at all, that extremely delightful tendril doing all the work (which made Kallus think that, yes, Thrawn had more control over it than he let on.) Thrawn dipped down to bite at his collarbone and Kallus bit his lip at the flexibility and the utter audacity of the Grand Admiral to be this sexual. It’d take all of his ISB training to be able to look at Thrawn while on duty and not get flustered because Thrawn was providing him with a lot of images that he would not be able to get out of his head.

“I did miss you, Agent Kallus.” Thrawn spoke softly against his skin, his hips moving so carefully that it made Kallus want to scream and tell Thrawn to actually _move_ but then he might set back all the process on his leg and Kallus had had more than enough of being confined in a medbay or in his room.

“Did you miss me or just my body?” He managed to actually think of something clever to say which was impressive considering that his mind was mostly filled with silent begging.

“We just had an absolutely delightful evening together, Agent Kallus. I believe you already know the answer.”

Kallus felt absolutely giddy inside at that and grinned for a second before Thrawn kissed him hard and overwhelmed him with warmth and wetness, his climax hitting him like a turbolaser. They kissed until they both had to breath, Kallus panting and Thrawn (as always) looking perfectly at ease (except for that familiar purple shade dusting his cheekbones).

“I know something that doesn’t involve my leg whatsoever.” Kallus licked his lips and grinned at the Grand Admiral.

“I do hope it involves your mouth.”

It did involve his mouth.

-

Kallus woke up and everything hurt. His head was pounding, his leg ached, and his throat felt utterly abused. The cause of (most of) his ailments was sprawled over his chest, the one part of his body that didn’t hurt, and seemed to be soundly asleep. Thrawn looked peaceful when he was asleep, the red (pigmentation? Tattoos?) around his eyes especially distinctive. Thrawn had lines near his eyes of one who smiled frequently and it made Kallus wonder what kind of man Thrawn had been before the Empire.

Unable to move, his thoughts drifted back to the previous day and, more specifically, his encounter with the Jedi. Kallus felt like he was at a crossroads. One direction had his allegiance change to become a Rebel. The other direction had him remain in service to the Empire and more specifically to Thrawn. It was a knife’s edge that he was walking. A single misstep would have incalculable consequences.

It didn’t help that he was currently sharing a bed with the single most perceptive being without the benefit of mystical powers in all of the Empire. That alone was enough to make him want to throw himself straight out an airlock. Zeb came to mind again. If he did this, it was for a greater cause. The Empire was guilty of genocide. Kallus had participated in a genocide. If he became a Rebel and helped their cause, then maybe he could absolve himself in some small way.

Kallus compartmentalized his thoughts of the Rebellion. It was much too dangerous to think about these things around Thrawn. He still wasn’t entirely convinced that the Chiss weren’t mindreaders, though, he supposed, if they were, he’d already be locked away in some Imperial prison.

A alarm started to beep, slowly getting louder. Kallus groaned and wriggled fruitlessly under Thrawn’s solid mass. This was not making his hangover better.

“Thrawn-” Kallus tried to say, dismayed when his voice was barely audible and extremely raspy.

The beeping reached a pitch that was evidently loud enough for Thrawn as his weight shifted off Kallus to absolutely smash whatever electronic was making the offending sound. Kallus watched, face flushing as Thrawn arched his back in a slow stretch, vertebrae popping loudly in the sudden silence. That man had no right to be this kriffing attractive.

“Are you well, Agent Kallus? I hope I did not injure your leg while we slept.”

Kallus shook his head, really not wanting to try to speak again.

He got a slight look of concern from Thrawn. “Agent Kallus?”

Kallus wondered what the best way to say, _Sorry sir, but you fucked the words right out of me_ was. He settled for just pointing at his extremely abused throat and grimacing slightly.

“I see.” Thrawn said, the absolute pinnacle of politeness. “Why don’t you go freshen up?”

Kallus gave Thrawn a cheeky salute and limped off to the refresher. There was a fully stocked medkit in a cabinet with pain meds. Kallus popped a few and sighed as his headache started to clear up almost immediately. His cast was supposed to come off today, he remembered, and hoped to the stars that his voice would be back by then. The thought of explaining to a med droid why his throat was the way it was and that he was fine made him cringe. A shower was most helpful until Thrawn joined him and made it unproductive, pressing him against the wall and kissing him until the water ran cold.

Then they were sitting at a table again, enjoying breakfast. Thrawn was uniformed but had provided Kallus with clothing again, this time a shirt that just said _Wild Space_ and soft black pants. It seemed like Thrawn picked up novelty items during his travels. Breakfast was an utter delight to Kallus as Thrawn actually had access to real food that wasn’t gray paste. The fresh pastries and the assortment of off world fruit were now second on his perks of fucking Thrawn list.

“Are they not feeding you, Agent?” Thrawn asked as he took another bite of a fruit that he’d perfectly sliced into small, equal chunks.

“Not like this.” Kallus managed to say after drinking some caf that he’d taken the liberty of adding honey to. It didn’t taste the best but he needed something soothing for his throat if he planned to face anyone today.

“You’ll have to stop by more often, then.” Thrawn was reading something on his datapad now. “I see that you’re getting your cast off today.”

“Yes,” said Kallus. “I wasn’t sure if how I was going to be treated, seeing how crash-landing on Bahryn was a sort of abject failure.”

“Konstantine did prove to be of some use by rescuing you.” A shadow of something dark passed across Thrawn’s face. “You weren’t treated immediately?”

The memory of limping back to the small room that he’d been assigned to, clutching that hot meteor for dear life, bo-rifle heavy on his back came to mind. Konstantine had barely acknowledged him and his sleep had been a painful one. He hadn’t been sent to a medbay until his return to Lothal, the bacta cast being his only option for recovery at this point after being forced to walk on a fractured leg.

“I’m fine now,” he said, reaching across the table to touch a cold blue hand in what he hoped was a reassuring gesture. “It wasn’t that bad.”

All of which was a total lie and he was sure Thrawn saw right through his words. The Grand Admiral didn’t push him for the truth and Kallus was grateful for that small mercy.

-

Later that day after Kallus had his cast removed and been put through a series of tests that ultimately concluded with him being declared fit for duty by a med droid, Thrawn summoned him to his office. Kallus was glad to be back in uniform, his light armor somehow feeling more reassuring than usual as he patiently waited for Thrawn to speak to him. Thrawn was staring out over Capital City, seemingly lost in thought.   
  
“Sir?” Kallus ventured, always hating to interrupt Thrawn while he was thinking.

Thrawn turned, red eyes studying him carefully as he took a seat at his desk. Kallus sat across from him, wondering what was about to happen.

“My office is secure,” Thrawn finally said, “so we may speak freely.”

Kallus inclined his head in acknowledgment, still not sure if he should be worried or not.

“Something you said earlier was the final piece in a puzzle that has been troubling me for some time. Agent Kallus, do you believe yourself to be in good standing with the ISB?”

“Yes?” Kallus said carefully, really not knowing if he was or not. He’d communicated with ISB Command a few times, Kallus informing them that Thrawn was loyal to the Empire through and through and had not ever disclosed anything about his people. the seduction aspect that he’d pushed for was not ever mentioned again, nor was the removal of his stims ever brought up. Kallus was sure that ISB would have known if the stims had been removed from his person, but nothing ever seemed to come from that.

“Before your mission to investigate me began, you were posted here on Lothal working against the local Rebel cell, not ever really finding success against them.”

Kallus opened his mouth to protest, to tell Thrawn just how clever those insurgents were, but was cut off by a raised blue hand.

“I do not fault you your shortcomings, Agent Kallus. They are extremely persistent and the Jedi are an unknown factor. However,” he pushed a datapad across the desk for Kallus to look at, “I believe that you have been targeted for the way you insisted on handling your mission.”   
  
The file on the datapad was an incomprehensible mess of charts and numbers. “Sir, what is this?”

“This is a toxicology report.” Thrawn explained. “If I had not been able to intervene and get you the medical attention you needed, you would have suffered an excruciating death.”

Kallus swallowed hard. Thrawn had said that he’d been close to death, but he hadn’t realized just _how_ close.

“In combination with how you were not treated immediately after Bahryn and your difficulties with combating the Rebel cell, it seems that your usefulness had come to an end.”

Kallus found himself feeling very frightened, a memory of Thrawn snapping that droid’s neck passing though his mind, and he braced himself for a fight that would almost certainly end his life for good.

“This shouldn’t come as much of a surprise to you, Agent Kallus, but I do not share those sentiments.”

A sigh escaped his lips before he could stop it and he looked up at Thrawn to see the Grand Admiral smiling ever so slightly at him.

“I believe that I can protect you from further repercussions if you stay by my side.”

“Of course,” Kallus said, “That’s all I want.”

His heart was racing and, stars, he hoped he didn’t come off as desperate but knowing that he had survived what was basically an assassination attempt and Thrawn had been the one to save him made him deeply indebted to the man and beyond thankful.

“I thought as much. Go get some air, Agent Kallus. You have much to think about.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> did y'all know that Kallus was initially going to be a Chiss? i didn't know that but Wookiepedia told me. God bless wookiepedia. though for some reason they don't have Thrawn's height which I would like to know thank you very much. 
> 
> uhh hh h gotta post this because I'm not at the top of the tag anymore and that simply will NOT DO. 
> 
> had a dream last night that there was another Star Wars trilogy and everyone loved it and it was hilarious and extremely good. woke up feeling sad about all the stupid fucking drama that there always is. anyways. 
> 
> comments give me life and kudos are great too. I love hearing your thoughts! byeeeee


	7. Kallus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kanan has some important information. Kallus picks a side.

Kallus felt like he was shaking as he walked around the Imperial Complex. The ISB wanted him dead because of his enthusiasm to serve Thrawn? More or less, that was what it boiled down to. It was funny how he was already considered a Rebel in the eyes of some though his intentions had only been for the good of the Empire. It had been a pointless mission then. They probably hoped for Kallus to do nothing more than embarrass himself and then keel over which would likely cast some sort of suspicion on Thrawn (and Thrawn really didn’t need more of that because he was perfectly loyal).

There was a cool breeze on his face and Kallus froze as he heard that same sort of ethereal sound from the previous night. He looked to his left and there was the Jedi again, his face shadowed by a dark hood.

“What are you doing here?” Kallus hissed.

“I’ve been walking next to you for the past ten minutes and you didn’t even notice.” Kanan gently teased him and turned down an alley.

Kallus followed, checking left and right for stormtroopers but the area was thankfully deserted. “How did you even get on Lothal? Even Imperial transports get stopped and searched.”

“When the Force calls, I must follow,” Kanan said in that infuriating Jedi way that explained absolutely nothing.

Kallus crossed his arms and sighed. Kanan wasn’t going to get information out of him either.

“I’m here again because I have a favor to ask.”

“Why are you trusting me?” Kallus asked in disbelief. “I’ve been chasing you Rebels around and now all of a sudden you think I’ve had a big change of heart?”

“The Force is never wrong, but maybe I misinterpreted something.” Kanan made as if to walk away but Kallus caught his arm and stopped him. The Jedi didn’t flinch, looking at him directly with those unseeing eyes.

“Look, I’m not a Rebel, but I suppose I owe Zeb. Any favor I do is for him, not for some greater cause or whatever.”

“Okay,” said Kanan, sounding vaguely amused. “This datapad has information on how to send a Fulcrum transmission.”

Kallus accepted the datapad, still utterly baffled by the circumstances. “And what makes you think that I won’t just give this information to Thrawn?”

Kanan shrugged. “Hope, I guess. You’ll know if it’s something that you need to communicate to us. I have faith in that. And besides, it’s just directions that don’t reveal too much.”

“You’d be surprised what he can do with a small amount of information.” Kallus read over the information one last time. It wasn’t too complex. There was a broadcast tower not too far from the city in the plains that the Rebels used. He handed the datapad back to Kanan.

“It’s better if I don’t have any physical ties to you all.”

Kanan inclined his head and moved aside as someone approached them from the shadows. To Kallus’ surprise, it was Zeb.

“Hera says that we need to get going before a bigger patrol comes along.” Those bright green eyes moved to look at Kallus as the Lasat acknowledged him. “Good to see you in one piece, Alex.”

Kallus found his face turning red. Again, the ice moon. Zeb had asked Kallus to call him by his name and in turn, Kallus had offered the same. Not even Thrawn called him Alex and it was strange to actually hear his name. “Good to see you too, Zeb.”

There was the sound of stormtrooper boots and their little clandestine group went their separate ways in a hurry. Kallus was now burdened with this information but he didn’t feel half bad about his potential treason. The ISB was out to get him, after all. He could carry a few more secrets.

That being said, he still had to face Thrawn at the end of the day and that was going to be the most difficult part. If Thrawn caught onto him, that would be the end. If he ended up betraying Thrawn after he’d offered him a position of safety at his side, the consequences would be tremendous. Kallus groaned into his hands. What the hell had he gotten himself into?

Maybe he really was a Rebel.

-

“Come and look at this.”

Kallus followed Thrawn to see what he was so excited about. On the exterior, Thrawn looked as calm as ever, but there was a particular spark in those glowing eyes that Kallus was very familiar with that betrayed his emotion.

“What is it, sir?” It was a hologram of a protocol droid. Nothing special about it that he could tell.

“This is an E-XD infiltrator droid.” Thrawn tapped at the controls and the droid transformed into something much more deadly and terrifying. “They will be launched to search out the Rebel base out of the most probable systems I’ve marked. This will effectively narrow down our search.”

His blood ran cold and Kallus realized with a dry mouth that this was information that he needed to get to the Rebels. This droid was a serious killing machine and there was no way to tell what damage it could do. Seeing as the Rebels enjoyed recruiting droids almost much as flesh and blood beings, his warning might actually save lives. 

Days had passed since his encounter with Kanan, but the information was still fresh in his mind. He urged the speeder to go faster, the striped grass parting around him as he headed for the lonely communications tower. Loth-cats scattered around him, some perking up to watch his passage. Normally he hated when Thrawn sent him away when a top-priority call came through but this time it had provided a perfect opportunity to sneak off and make his transmission.

Everything was covered in a fine layer of dust. It didn’t seem like anyone had been in here for some time, using the communications systems or otherwise. He noted painted stormtrooper helmets, nearly a collection of them, and wondered what Thrawn would learn from them. Kallus shook his head and focused on his transmission. He could only hope that this information would make it to the Rebels in time and that he’d be able to prevent the discovery of the base for as long as he could.

He exhaled a long breath and willed his hands to stop shaking. “This is Fulcrum, with an urgent transmission…”

The plunge into treason was easier than he thought it would be.

-

Thrawn had informed him about the persistent equipment failures that kept coming out of one of the factories on Lothal. Kallus had forgotten all about that. Thrawn, of course, had not and he announced his intentions to tour the factory and discover what the true issue was.

They were still in bed in an odd semblance of domesticity and Kallus wondered, not for the first time, what the Grand Admiral would classify their relationship as. Were they lovers? Or were they just using each other?

“What do you plan to do about the drop in production quality?” Kallus asked.

“I will put an end to it.” Thrawn declared ominously.

Kallus barely had time to shiver at that statement before Thrawn had _pounced_ on him, fingers tangled in his hair and kissing him with the passion of someone who was very eager for the rest of the day.

In hindsight, that should have been a flag of some sort. Maybe not a red flag, but a small flag of some color that was a warning of _hey something is going to happen today that Thrawn will enjoy and you will not_.

Breakfast had to be rushed so they could get to the factory at the appropriate time. Kallus was morose that he hadn’t gotten to eat a third pastry. Thrawn seemed to be more disappointed that he couldn’t go a third round with Kallus.

“You’re going to wrinkle your uniform,” Kallus had protested as Thrawn had pushed him against the cold durasteel wall of his quarters, cold hands sliding up his tunic. The door was right there and they were veering dangerously close to being late.

That had convinced him well enough, thankfully. Kallus was sure that he was going to be permanently flushed for the rest of the day. Why had Thrawn been so eager this morning? Should he be concerned? Maybe it was just a Chiss biology thing that he didn’t understand.

At the factory Kallus stood by Thrawn’s side and hoped he looked the part of an intimidating ISB agent. Thrawn requested for the workers to gather and at first, that had been fine. Then Kallus recognized two particular heights and was able to just barely make out the faces of Kanan and the boy Jedi, Ezra. What the hell were they doing here?

His thoughts turned from panic to horror as Thrawn ordered a worker (thankfully not one of the Rebels that he knew of) to test his work. It took all of his ISB training to not throw himself at Thrawn and force the man to stop as the smell of superheated metal filled the air. The explosion was almost a relief but Kallus knew that the stench of burning flesh would not leave his nose for sometime.

Thrawn turned towards him and Kallus met his gaze to see the glinting triumph of a predator that had just caught some prey. It was terrifying. He barely made out Thrawn’s words over the echoing explosion in his head, but managed to nod along and hurry off to find the two workers that had vanished.

Kallus wanted to throw up, but there was no time for any of that and he had to make that Kanan and Ezra (whatever they were doing here) got out safely. He had been so distracted by Thrawn that he hadn’t seen which way they had gone. Kallus stepped into a turbo lift with two troopers. As the doors closed, he noticed how short one was and turned to face them.

“Oh, come on,” said Ezra, his hand at the hilt of his lightsaber.

Kanan didn’t make a move, seemingly waiting for something.

“By the light of Lothal’s moons,” Kallus hissed. “You must have a death wish!”

“Karabast!” Ezra said, flipping his visor up to regard Kallus with some measure of awe. “You’re Fulcrum?”

“You saved Zeb’s skin with that transmission about the infiltrator droid. And the location of the base. Thank you.”

Kanan’s words made him glow with pride. So this was worth it.

“Where are you two going?” He asked.

“Comms station.” Ezra said, flipping his visor back down. “We’ve got to get out of here.”

“Okay.” Kallus thought quickly. “I can transmit and you two… do your Jedi thing.”

The older Jedi gave him the necessary information and Kallus prepared to act for his life as the turbo lift stopped and the doors slid open. He ran into the comms room and fired a shot at the Jedi which went wide by a good meter. 

“Rebels! Watch out!” Kallus yelled, sending the comm room into a distracted frenzy as the Jedi methodically knocked the Imperials out. The transmission went through.

“Looks like your friend is already attacking the east gate. Best go out that way then.”

Kanan nodded and patted his back. “Thank you, Alex.”

“You two need to know,” Kallus sighed, “Thrawn’s really close to discovering your base, wherever it is. Despite stopping that droid, he’s narrowed it down to a handful of systems.”

There was an explosion in the direction of the east gate.

Kallus braced himself, “You better make this look good-“

His eyes went wide as he was lifted from the ground by that Jedi magic and thrown straight though a glass view screen. The last thing he saw before he passed out was Ezra grinning at him.

“Welcome to the Rebellion.”

A familiar voice woke him up, one that now gave him a feeling of dread. “Agent Kallus, are you alright? Do you require medical attention?”

“No… No, I don’t think so.”

Thrawn helped him up, his presence still reassuring despite how Kallus was beginning to view him as an enemy. As Thrawn looked him over with genuine concern in his eyes, Kallus felt like he was being torn apart. He was heading down a path that Thrawn would and could not follow. And it hurt even more as he realized that at some point during all of this mess, he’d fallen deeply in love with the person he was now actively working against.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> kanan shows up *crowd cheers*   
> "Alex" *crowd goes wild*   
> "Welcome to the Rebellion" *absolute chaos* 
> 
> you may have noticed that there is an actual chapter count now. I did an outline and that's about where we're at, barring any further adjustments. I'm very pleased to have a beginning, middle, and end to this. I thought Eli would show up for longer, but Treason is so tightly written that there's only like one spot to squeeze that boy in. anyways, please look forward to that. 
> 
> comments are much appreciated!


	8. Kallus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A return to the Chimaera. Kallus makes a declaration.

Lothal faded from view as the _Chimaera_ jumped to hyperspace. Kallus was glad that he’d gotten the Fulcrum message about potential rebel recruits sent before joining Thrawn for a shuttle flight to the _Chimaera_. He hoped that Thrawn attributed the nervous bouncing of his leg to potential dissatisfaction as he’d been kicked from the Grand Admiral’s chambers soon after awakening with instructions to prepare to return to the Chimaera due to potential rebel activity at Skystrike Academy. He’d barely had time to get the message off and he hoped that it reached the Rebels in time. If not, Kallus planned to do what he could to rescue the potential defectors.

Thrawn had been curt at his lateness. They were sitting across from each other in the shuttle and Kallus was experiencing a nasty mix of emotions: anxiety, regret, guilt, and, most of all, the heaviness of lovesickness. Worst of all, he couldn’t talk freely because two of Thrawn’s death troopers were here. Regular troopers didn’t bother him and he felt like being an ISB agent also gave him some bit of an intimidation factor, but death troopers were on a whole different level. They weren’t keen on protecting anyone other than their Primary and Kallus didn’t want to give them any reasons to like or dislike him. Hopefully they understood that Thrawn was fond of him, at the very least.

He felt Thrawn look up at him, finally, from his data pad. Kallus met those glowing eyes and felt his face flush. When Thrawn addressed him, it was with more kindness than earlier.

“My apologies, Agent Kallus, if I came off as rude earlier. There’s another matter that I will have to attend to shortly and the situation on Lothal is escalating, as you well know.” He sighed heavily. “Command keeps calling me away at crucial moments.”

“Should I return to Lothal, sir?” Kallus asked. He wouldn’t be able to interfere with Skystrike, but he could do his best to cause more trouble for the Empire on Lothal.

“That won’t be necessary. I’m sure Governor Pryce can handle things for a short amount of time. Konstantine should be able to…” Thrawn shook his head and muttered quietly to himself. “Who am I kidding? Those two will almost certainly ruin my plans.”

Kallus suppressed a smile at Thrawn’s snide comment. Personally, he was happy enough if Thrawn’s plans didn’t work out. If the Imperials did the Rebellion’s work by screwing up the work of the most competent naval commander, then all the better.

The shuttle landed in the _Chimaera_ ’s docking bay and Kallus followed Thrawn off the shuttle, a polite step behind. The death troopers moved to flank Thrawn and Kallus found himself lagging behind the three of them. Did Thrawn even need him? Or was Kallus free to go have a quick anxiety attack in his quarters?

Faro was greeting Thrawn now and they were talking quietly about something that Kallus couldn’t make out. Then that group headed off to the bridge, presumably, and Agent Kallus was left standing in the hanger bay, awkward and alone.

“Off to a great start,” he mumbled to himself.

Well, if Thrawn was going to be like that, then he’d make himself scarce. A Star Destroyer had a lot of places to hide (the _Chimaera_ in particular had a really good lounge) and he had his comm if Thrawn actually needed him.

“We’ve all been there,” someone called out to him.

Kallus turned to acknowledge them and was surprised to see a pilot climbing out of a TIE Defender. Someone was bold enough to talk to him? That was a surprise, to be sure, but a welcome one. He walked over towards the Defender and watched the Human descend a ladder to the hangar floor.

“You… saw that too?” Kallus said, a bit morose that someone else had witnessed him being abandoned by his CO and had pointed it out.

The pilot approached him and gave a crisp salute. “Captain Benj Dobbs, sir.” Dobbs gave a cocky grin. “I think you’re a sir to me.”

Kallus gave a half-assed salute, glad that they were out of view of most everyone in the shadow of the Defender. “I couldn’t tell you the answer to that one, Captain Dobbs.” He hesitated, but decided to ask anyways. “You know I’m ISB, right? That makes most people turn the other way.”

Dobbs leaned against the solar panel, still grinning. “I couldn’t leave another man behind like that, Agent Kallus. Come on, I’ll buy you a drink.”

Kallus blinked in surprise and then agreed. Dobbs’ attitude was refreshing and Kallus really hadn’t been spending much time with other Imperials… being that he was betraying them and all. But this pilot didn’t seem all that bad and so, without hesitation, Kallus followed him.

“How do you know me?” He asked Dobbs, wondering how the pilot knew his name.

“Oh, there’s a lot of scuttlebutt on the _Chimaera_ ,” he said.

“Grand Admiral Thrawn doesn’t mind that?” Kallus asked carefully.

“I mean, it all kind of gets back to him anyways, you know? Besides, I think he asks Faro about the latest gossip. Good man. Can actually hold a conversation with his crew.”

That sounded like Thrawn, all right. Thinking back to his interviews with the crew (which felt like an eternity ago) he remembered Dobbs being the one who had said something about Thrawn having fought off a squad of B2 battle droids.

There was a cheer as Dobbs entered the cantina, one arm slung over Kallus’ shoulders in a friendly gesture and the other hand waving a cred chip in the air.

“Someone get this Agent a beer!” Dobbs exclaimed.

Before Kallus could even make the slightest bit of protest (not that he needed to) he had a pint in one hand and was sitting at a long table filled with off-duty crew members, some wearing officer’s uniforms and others wearing wearing the white body armor of stormtroopers and the black armor of TIE pilots. Helmets were off as they laughed and drank, a sense of camaraderie among them like Kallus hadn’t seen in some time.

He wondered if the Rebellion would be like this. From what he’d seen of the interactions between the _Ghost_ ’s crew, he assumed it would be.

“Okay, okay. Kallus- Kallus. You’ve got to give us the hottest of hot gossip and answer the question that _everyone_ wants to know.” Dobbs paused dramatically. “Are you and our blue, bad-ass, beautiful, beloved Grand Admiral Thrawn, whom we all admire from the bottom of our Imperial souls,” There was a cheer and glasses were raised to that, “an _Item_?”

Kallus had seen this question coming from a light-year away but he still spit his drink across the table, much to the delight of everyone at the table. He felt his face go bright red and not just because of the amount of alcohol he’d consumed.

Dobbs nudged him. “Come on, Kallus. It’s been _months_ and everyone’s dying to know. Thrawn is evasive about it. Faro won’t tell.”

_Fuck it_ , Kallus decided. If Thrawn wasn’t going to ever clear things up and if he was committing treason anyways, then he might as well become the stuff of _legend_.

Cheered on, Kallus stood up and made his declaration to his fellow (soon to be former) comrades. “The rumors have been many and most likely exaggerated, but here’s the truth,” he paused for dramatic effect, “I am absolutely, totally, utterly, madly, and foolishly in _love_ with Grand Admiral Thrawn and he’s as _impressive_ in _bed_ as he is in battle!”

The bar went absolutely nuts and Kallus grinned as the crew of the _Chimaera_ toasted him, Dobbs clapping him roughly on the back. He felt a glow of pride fill his stomach, happy to be the one who was in love with Thrawn. The question remained if Thrawn felt the same way, but Kallus wasn’t sure that he cared either way. The crew was thrilled for him and it felt good.

Kallus still felt good even when a quiet voice cut through the hubbub that seemingly no one else heard.

“My, Agent Kallus, I am flattered.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry but not sorry for a cliffhanger. I like my chapters longer but sometimes you just have to *chef's kiss* do a nice divide. dobbs?? who invited you?? You don't even have a physical description on Wookieepedia, you imperial scoundrel, you! 
> 
> [just a note: I have turned on comment moderation (and removed a tag) because my snide comment about a lot of non-con in Thallus tag didn't go over well. I don't do the whole internet arguing thing - I literally have no social media because of that. this is the first thing I've written in YEARS that I actually feel good about and that I'm happy to write and that I have a beginning, middle, and end to. I will not let anyone spoil my fun. Thanks and please don't be a jerk]
> 
> *fades into the bushes to write the second half*
> 
> also... I fuckin did just Wookieepedia the Chimaera and had been spelling it wrong the whole ding-dang time if you can even imagine. when this is all done (soonish) I'll edit it.


	9. 8.5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Part 2. Feelings are laid bare.

His knees went weak and he looked at the entrance to the bar just in time to catch a flash of blue and white and red leaving.

“I have to go,” he told Dobbs.

“You’re always welcome here!” Dobbs said, raising his glass with a grin.

Kallus bolted out of the room, not caring that he was running, not caring who saw him. Hell, the Emperor himself could’ve appeared in the hallway and he wouldn’t have stopped. He _had_ to speak to Thrawn now and get his side of things. He caught up just as Thrawn entered a turbo lift, sliding on the polished floor and just made it in. Kallus noted Thrawn’s hand an inch away from the button that would hold the doors, so at least he wouldn’t have been crushed. Panting, he leaned against the wall, his hands on his knees, and looked anywhere but at Thrawn.

  
He was terrified of asking questions.

He was terrified of learning the truth.

But he was going to be brave. After all, he didn’t have much to lose.

“Thrawn-“

“Kallus-“

They spoke at the same time and Kallus laughed breathlessly, “Sir, go ahead.”

“I will speak freely when we reach my quarters. Is that agreeable, Agent Kallus?”

At least they were _going_ to speak about it.

“Yes, sir.”

Time seemed to pass at a Hutt’s pace as he followed Thrawn out of the turbolift and to his quarters. Waiting was pure agony as Thrawn unlocked his quarters. Kallus thanked whatever entity was out there (he was a Rebel now, so the Force?) that the death troopers were nowhere to be seen. The door closing behind them was the loudest sound and Kallus nearly jumped. Fuck. This was the most nervous he’d been since his finals at the Academy. Thrawn was pacing, a sign that he was thinking, but restless.

“I admit,” Thrawn said, finally, stopping his pacing and facing Kallus, “that has never happened to me before.”

Kallus didn’t say anything, holding his breath in anticipation as Thrawn carefully chose his next words.

“Basic doesn’t have a word that aptly describes my feelings towards you.”

He let his breath out, feeling like he was going to pass out, and met Thrawn’s glowing gaze. Nervous. Kallus was so nervous.

“I can think of a chain of words but…” A flash of frustration passed over his face and then he seemed to come to a solution.

Kallus watched with dawning understanding as Thrawn began to alter the holoprojections of art around the room, shutting off all but two and then altering what they were projecting with a datapad so that there were just two paintings glowing before them in the full glorious color of a high quality holo. Thrawn moved back to him and took his hand, leading him to sit down on a couch that faced both paintings. There they sat, quiet, taking in the colors.

[ _https://www.vangoghgallery.com/catalog/image/0467/Café-Terrace-on-the-Place-du-Forum,-Arles,-at-Night,-The.jpg_ ](https://www.vangoghgallery.com/catalog/image/0467/Caf%C3%A9-Terrace-on-the-Place-du-Forum,-Arles,-at-Night,-The.jpg)

[ _https://www.vangoghgallery.com/catalog/image/0222/Fourteenth-of-July-Celebration-in-Paris,-The.jpg_ ](https://www.vangoghgallery.com/catalog/image/0222/Fourteenth-of-July-Celebration-in-Paris,-The.jpg)

It made sense to Kallus. Art was Thrawn’s first love and the lens through which he viewed the rest of the galaxy. For him, it was a far more meaningful expression than words alone could convey. Kallus rested his head on Thrawn’s shoulder and listened to his soft voice.

“The chemicals, derived from my own blood, that ran through your veins at first clouded my perception of you. I was dismayed that my biology would be used against me, that a special part of my species’ life was corrupted to manipulate me into sharing vital information that could have dire consequences for my people. I learned that it would have killed you; that you would have suffered a needless and painful death for what was never just a mission to you, but far more personal. You came to me after I had saved you and it was both what we needed. Kallus, you asked me once how I knew I was doing the right thing. I think you know the answer to that now.”

Thrawn had pressed a hand solidly against Kallus’ heart.

“Your heart holds the answer.”

Tears ran down Kallus’ cheeks and onto the white expanse of Thrawn’s uniform. Thrawn didn’t push him away. He held Kallus close and let him cry.

“But, yes, I believe that I, too, have fallen in love with you, Alex.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so I could have left it as one chapter but it's fun to have a little pause there because uuuuhhh that's what you do in a real book alsflhshdhg
> 
> Please enjoy the works of Vincent van Gogh and imagine that they're looking at a space version. 
> 
> the caffeine is finally wearing off. you'd think that dark roast has more caffeine but it's the other way around. 
> 
> I read the last book of the original Thrawn trilogy since it was the only one available for me to borrow from library and legends Thrawn basically goes "But... it was so artistically done." and fucking dies. so. you know. I'm still laughing.


	10. Kallus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Agent Kallus rescues several Rebels. Kissing is used as an effective distraction.

Thrawn hadn’t asked why he was crying. He hadn’t judged him for that. Kallus was grateful. Crying was never easy when you were in the military. Sometimes it had to happen. Kallus knew that things were about to get much worse. As much as he adored Thrawn, the Empire was pure evil. In order to save lives, in order to free Lothal, in order to protect the Rebellion, he was going to have to sacrifice everything.

And the fact that Thrawn loved him back, well, that broke his heart.

A glowing cafe at night, with stars shining brightly in the sky. Abstract fireworks at night, a riot of colors, some of the blues the same color of Thrawn’s skin. That was what Thrawn had shown him and the art lingered in his mind’s eye.

They had arrived at Skystrike. Thrawn had gone to change his uniform to one that wasn’t tearstained and Kallus was splashing cold water on his face, hoping that the redness around his eyes would go away before he had to face anyone.

He looked up at the mirror to see Thrawn standing behind him, back to looking perfect as usual, just the slightest hint of concern on his face.

“I’m fine,” said Kallus.

“Whatever is burdening you, Alex, is not something that you have to bear alone.”

“This isn’t something I can share, sir.” Kallus said politely, but firmly, and moved past Thrawn.

He didn’t want to see the hurt in Thrawn’s eyes. It was time for them to do their jobs.

-

He’d barely stepped into the Academy when his commlink buzzed.

“Kallus here,” he said.

“Uh, sir, Governor Pryce was knocked out. The defectors have escaped from the detention block.”

“I’m on my way. Thank you, trooper.” Kallus clicked his comm off and prepared to meet whoever these defectors were.

He hoped he could reach them in time. Kallus misinformed the two squads of troopers that he came across and sent them in the opposite direction. H reached a blast door near the detention block and keyed it open.

“Hey!” Sabine Wren said, aiming two blasters at him. “I’m going to enjoy this.”

“Oh for-“ Kallus huffed. The word had not spread, evidently. “By the light of Lothal’s moons.”

Sabine’s eyes went wide and she holstered her weapons. “Wow. Zeb really did recruit you, huh?”

“More or less. I came to my own conclusions, too.” He nodded his head at the cadets. “Just these two?”

“Yeah,” Sabine said. “What's the best way out?”

“Head for hanger 24. I’ve given you a clear shot, but it won’t be long before they search that area.”

“You’re sure risking a lot, Agent Kallus. Thank you.”

“You have no idea,” he muttered.

-

Thrawn called him to the bridge soon after Sabine and the cadets had safely gotten away. It was a relief that they were safe, but Kallus was worried about what kind of mood that would have put the Grand Admiral in. As it turned out, Thrawn wasn’t the one he needed to be worried about. A lieutenant stopped him and told him about a prisoner that had just arrived.

“Some bounty hunter. He keeps saying his name is Jabba the Hutt.”

Kallus felt his face go white. Today wasn’t his day. “I’ll handle this. Where is he?”

“Detention block B7.”

Kallus ran off in that direction, hoping he made it to Ezra before Thrawn did. Though, that being said, he could see where Thrawn was at. The man trusted him, after all.

He commed Thrawn while in a turbo lift. “Sir? A different issue has arisen.”

“I understand, Agent Kallus.” Thrawn’s voice sounded tense. “We may be leaving for Coruscantin a few hours, but I am not certain. I will keep you informed. Thrawn out.”

None of that was reassuring whatsoever. Hopefully it had nothing to do with him. Kallus exited the turbo lift into the detention area and braced himself for whatever was next. He could hear Ezra complaining loudly all the way through the durasteel as he deactivated the security cameras. Kallus rolled his eyes and opened the door.   
  
“Just wait until my _uncle_ , the Emperor, hears about this!”

“Simmer down, kid,” Kallus said, shutting the door. “I just saved Sabine and two cadets. Why are you now, also, in danger? And how’d you even get on the _Chimaera_?”

“I’m here to rescue you!” Ezra said proudly.

Kallus gave Ezra a confused look and when his expression didn’t change, Kallus sighed. “You’re being serious.”

“Of course! You’ve done more than enough and now I’m here to extract you.”

“No, no. My work here isn’t done. Did Sabine send you or something? Your timing is weird.”

“Totally unrelated. I just happened to be in the area. It seemed like maybe it was time for you to-“ Ezra gestured vaguely, “you know. Dip out.” 

“Not yet.” Kallus checked his comm and felt the blood drain from his face. “Thrawn says he’s narrowed it down to ten planets. If you tell me the location - I could delete it from his star charts.”

Ezra shook his head. “If you’re staying, then having that information is too dangerous. AP-5 could delete the planet and also get the access codes that I need.”

“Fine,” said Kallus, deciding not to ask what an AP-5 was. “We’ll do it your way. Stay here. I’ll get you a uniform so you don’t stick out.”

Kallus ducked out into the hall. Still deserted, thankfully. There was a supply closet with extra uniforms and most importantly, the terrible eye-covering hats of low ranking Imperial officers. He gathered the requisite clothing and hoped he’d gauged Ezra’s height correctly. He tossed the clothing into the cell and waited, his right leg shaking with nerves at the whole situation.

“How do I look?” asked Ezra, adjusting the hat over his eyes as he exited the cell.

“Like a useless lieutenant that nobody will notice. Where’s this AP-5 of yours?”

“Here I am. Ignored as always.” The most morose voice possible came from an Imperial protocol droid that Kallus hadn’t noticed waiting in the hall.

“Oh good, AP-5! We’re going to steal some codes and delete a planet.”

“Wonderful,” said the droid. “I love stealing from the Empire.”

Kallus once again wondered how he had gotten into this whole situation.

-

They made it to Thrawn’s office without further incident. The uniform really did work well. No wonder the Rebels were always knocking out stormtroopers and taking their armor. Kallus keyed the door open and followed the other two inside. No one seemed to notice or care and Kallus hoped that he wasn’t using all his luck up.

“Hurry, you two.” Kallus hissed.

“Okay, okay,” Ezra said. “Just keep an eye out, okay?”

“I know!” Kallus snapped, absolutely anxious at this point. His comm buzzed. It was Thrawn.

“Agent Kallus? What is your status?”

Kallus mentally cursed. “Took care of that situation, sir. What do you need from me?”

“I need to discuss our next mission. I’ll be in my office. Thrawn out.”

Karabast! Of course he was coming. Kallus turned to see that the star map had been activated and that a red planet had vanished. Well, at least they had gotten that far.

“I don’t know how close he is. I’ll distract him, so get ready to hide.” Kallus hissed.

“Why don’t you set those assassin droids on him?” Ezra suggested, not sounding nervous at all.

“Kid, what I’m going to do is guaranteed to work.”

Thrawn, with perfect dramatic timing, was at the door and was inside before Kallus could decide if it would be a good idea for him to take his tunic top off or not.

“Oh, good,” said Thrawn, looking the slightest bit surprised. “You’re here already.”

Kallus mentally crossed his fingers that Ezra was hidden and so was that protocol droid. If not, then he would go the assassin droid route and leave with Ezra after all.

“I thought it’d be more convenient if I met you here.” Kallus bit his lip nervously.

Thrawn was immediately staring at his mouth, red eyes glowing brightly in the dim light. He moved forward and Kallus moved carefully backwards until his back hit cold durasteel. If Thrawn had his back to the hallway and was sufficiently distracted, there would be plenty of opportunity for Ezra and the droid to leave. He placed his hands on Thrawn’s shoulders and closed the gap between them. Thrawn didn’t stop the kiss, his cold hands gently cradling Kallus’ face as he reciprocated, sighing ever so gently. Kallus cracked one eye open to see Ezra tiptoeing past them with AP-5 right behind him. His expression was a mix of horrified fascination, interest, and dismay, but Ezra gave him a thumbs-up anyways and then the two of them were gone. Kallus closed his eyes and really focused on Thrawn, not knowing how much more time the two of them had left.

-

“You are talented at distracting me, Agent Kallus.” Thrawn told him, sitting at his desk and studying the holo of the remaining possible rebel base locations. His face still had a dusting of purple to it and his uniform was just slightly wrinkled.

Kallus was just grateful that Ezra had left before he’d gotten on his knees. He’d never be able to face the kid again if Ezra had witnessed what he’d just done.

“Our next mission?” Kallus gently prompted the Grand Admiral.

“Yes,” Thrawn said, shutting the projection down. “The TIE Defender project is in danger of being shut down and funds diverted to Project Stardust.”

Thrawn was unhappy about this, his eyes narrowing slightly. Kallus was more interested in this Project Stardust. There was something in development that was more compelling than Thrawn’s TIEs? That was interesting. Even Lord Vader had expressed his interest in the Defenders, so this Stardust thing must be impressive.

Great. Now he had to find out what it was.

“Project Stardust, sir?” Kallus asked. “I’m not sure that I’ve heard of that.”

“No, you wouldn’t have.” Thrawn said dryly. “I only found out about it by, more or less, poking into things. I’m in on the secret now, as it were.”

Kallus opened his mouth to ask more about Stardust but was interrupted by Thrawn’s comm.

“Yes?” said Thrawn.

“Sir, there was a skirmish in the main hanger bay and a shuttle’s been stolen.”

That must have been Ezra. Kallus thanked the Force that the boy had gotten out safely. Hopefully deleting the location of the Rebel base had been worth it and would buy them some time before Thrawn inevitably discovered the location.

Thrawn gave a heavy sigh. “Let it go. There’s no time to pursue any further activity. Any further news from Governor Tarkin?”

“Just a new set of coordinates, sir. You’re to rendezvous aboard the _Firedrake_.”

“Set course, then, Commodore Faro. Let’s not keep them waiting. Thrawn out.”

Kallus felt a subtle shift in the background noise of the ship as the _Chimaera_ jumped to hyperspace. Tarkin? That man was not a good sign. He was right up there with Lord Vader on Kallus’ list of Imperials to not piss off.

“Is there anything I can do to help?” Kallus asked.

Thrawn shrugged, brows narrowed slightly in thought. “Get some rest, I suppose. I will call you when I need you.”

-

The only thing keeping him from dying of boredom was the running commentary scrolling across his datapad from the _Chimaera_ ’s crew. He’d already packed up his most essential items in case he needed to leave quickly. He’d already cleaned his bo-rifle. He’d managed to rest for about an hour. Thrawn still hadn’t called for him so Kallus had turned to the ever reliable network of comm gossip to figure out what was going on.

A Ronan was now on the ship and apparently he had a cape. There was a lot of discussion about capes. The crew generally agreed that this cape seemed to represent Ronan’s status as being a real asshole. Kallus really hoped he’d meet this guy. He sounded like the kind of Imperial that made Kallus hate being a part of the Empire.

Thrawn was now… hunting grallocs? Kallus was totally lost. The gunners were complaining about how they “keep kriffin’ moving.” A lot of praise was being sent to Dobbs for his excellent catch.

Kallus thought about comming Thrawn, but it seemed like the man was incredibly busy. This thought was only confirmed when klaxons started blaring in a battle ready alert. What was going on? Still, nothing from Thrawn or anyone else for that matter. He settled for pacing nervously, hoping that they weren’t fighting the Rebellion. It didn’t seem that way - there would almost certainly be a bunch of chatter about crushing the Rebellion and all that.

After the battle had ended, the messages suddenly became much more interesting. A comm code that he hadn’t seen before was the one updating the crew. DT? A death trooper? That was odd.

“Oh,” said Kallus, his eyes widening as he read further.

_Man’s been gone for a year and all he said was “Good day.” SMH. Also other Chiss but Vanto? Can you even believe it?_

Eli Vanto was here? Here with _Chiss_? His comm rang. Thrawn was finally summoning him.

“Agent Kallus, would you be so kind to escort Lieutenant Eli Vanto to Commadore Faro’s office?”

“Yes, sir.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SMH = Shaking My Helmet 
> 
> that's right! Vanto is here! man Treason is such a tightly written book that there's hardly any room to squeeze your own stuff in. anyways. Vanto was free for about two hours so Kallus will get to have a nice chat with the boy. 
> 
> the gossip is strong with the Chimaera.


	11. Treason

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kallus and Vanto have a little talk. Kallus commits treason.

“Grand Admiral Thrawn assured me that you’d keep an eye on this… traitor.”

As Ronan exited the shuttle, Kallus’ realized that the comm chatter hadn’t been in the slightest bit exaggerated. This man was a real piece of work. He straightened up as the mythical (in his mind, at least) Eli Vanto emerged, his brown eyes alert as he gave a cautious nod to the stormtrooper captain who appeared to be pointing out Kallus to him.

Vanto was shorter than he’d expected. Kallus had seen holos of him, so he had a general sense of what he looked like, but holos never did justice to the real thing. He knew, of course, of the ten years that Vanto had spent serving with Thrawn, but hadn’t accounted for how much influence Thrawn left on the man. He could see it in his posture and the confident way he walked and even that slight smile on his face. 

“You must be Agent Kallus.” Vanto said, his voice a pleasant mixture of a Wild Space drawl andwhat was, Kallus supposed, a Chiss accent. “Grand Admiral Thrawn was able to assure certain parties that you would be more than capable of supervising me.”

“Of course. Please, follow me.”

They made their way towards Faro’s office. Eli stuck out in his Chiss uniform, getting many a concerned look from the crew. Kallus gave several officers a severe glare that made them look away and they were able to make it to the office without any interruptions. Despite the whole _I’m in love with Thrawn_ thing, the crew still took him seriously. At least to his face.

He situated himself near the door, keeping a close eye on Vanto as he set up the computer. Kallus was dying to talk to the man, to ask him about how he was able to leave the Empire, among other things. They were both traitors, really, and that was only one thing that they had in common.

Some time passed before Vanto spoke and broke the silence. “Is Thrawn well?”

Kallus was a little surprised by the sudden question and took a second to think about it.

“He is. The Empire is keeping him busy on all fronts. I wouldn’t go as far to say overwhelmed, but…” Kallus trailed off, hoping that had been a sufficient answer.

“I thought as much,” said Vanto.

“I don’t mean to distract you from your task, but I have questions that I fear only you could answer.”

Vanto spun his chair to face him, a grin across his face. “Is it about Thrawn?”

Kallus felt his face grow hot. Was he really that transparent? “Well, not entirely about him. You and I have certain things in common. That’s all.”

“Stars, please.” Vanto said with a short sigh of relief. “I really just need to chat with someone about,” he gestured vaguely, “all of this.”

“Are you glad you left the Empire?” Kallus asked carefully.

“I left because Thrawn felt I could serve the Ascendancy better.” Vanto raised an eyebrow. “Is he sending you off as well?”

“Can you keep a secret?”

“Sure.”

It was much easier to actually say it out loud than he’d imagined it would be. “I’m defecting to the Rebellion.”

Vanto’s look of surprise was endearing. “Wow, was not expecting that. Did you learn about the slavery?”

“What?” Kallus was dismayed, but not surprised to hear that.

“Yeah, uh, that’s a thing too. Well, better you know now, I guess.” Vanto gave a helpless shrug. “Honestly, Thrawn was the only part of the Empire I cared about.”

“I wish that were enough.” Kallus said sadly. “How close were you to him?”

“I think you know the answer to that, Agent Kallus. Thrawn says your name the way he used to say mine.” His voice was wistful. “How long have you been with him?”

“Nearly a year. It’s a long story.”

“I’m sure.” Vanto gave a warm smile that put Kallus totally at ease. “We do have a lot in common, Agent Kallus. You’re making a difficult decision. Leaving Thrawn was difficult for me. I still don’t understand his reasoning and probably won’t for some time. And it hasn’t been easy integrating into a totally different culture of which Thrawn is nothing like.”

“I was going to ask,” said Kallus.

“There’s no one like him,” Vanto said softly. “Rebelling is another matter entirely. Are you prepared to sacrifice your relationship? He doesn’t open up easily to others.”

Kallus blinked away the sudden tears in his eyes. “There are others who have lost far more than I have because of the Empire.” 

“You’re doing what you know to be right, even though it’s painful. I wish you all the luck in the world, Agent Kallus. You’re certainly going to need it.”

Kallus let Vanto finish working. Sure, there were other things he could ask, but that had cleared up his most pressing questions. He felt more confident with his decision now, which helped lift some of the heaviness from his heart. The door to Faro’s office opened and Thrawn entered. Kallus noted how Vanto’s face lit up at seeing his former (still?) commander again. Thrawn actually smiled at Vanto before turning to Kallus.

“The situation on Lothal has escalated, Agent Kallus.” Thrawn’s voice was tense with frustration. “Once this matter has been resolved, I will return to Lothal. Until then, I leave the situation in your hands. A shuttle has been readied for you.”

“Thank you, sir.” Kallus said and made to leave.

“Agent Kallus,” Vanto called.

Kallus turned to face him, pausing in the doorway.

“May warrior’s fortune be with you.”

~ ~ ~

“What did you and Agent Kallus talk about?” asked Thrawn, finally alone with Vanto.

“You. And other things.” Vanto looked up and closed his eyes as Thrawn gently cupped his face.

“What kinds of things?”

He shivered at Thrawn’s hot breath on his face, wishing the man would shut up and kiss him already.

“You’ll figure it out soon enough.”

And then Thrawn was finally kissing him and Vanto’s heart was fit to burst with happiness. The happy moment was quickly broken as Thrawn sprung back suddenly to a polite distance and said something about numbers just as Ronan walked back in, demanding to know what was going on.

Vanto sighed. No rest for the weary.

~ ~ ~

Those words stuck with him on the flight back to Lothal. Not just the pleasant way that Vanto had wished him well, but the thoughtful expression that had passed over Thrawn’s face at hearing those words.

He’d absolutely be needing all the warrior’s fortune he could get.

Production of the TIE Defenders was now in full force on Lothal. Pryce had the mines working at full capacity and the grey-brown of pollution had begun to settle around Capital City. Kallus gritted his teeth as he rode his speeder through the mostly streets on the way to the communication tower where he would send another Fulcrum message. The few people he saw looked tired and frightened. He slowed briefly as he saw the sign of _The Loth-Wolf_ but the bar was now boarded up. Just as well. It wasn’t like he’d be going there with Thrawn ever again.

A white loth-cat followed him inside as he began to broadcast, staring at him with wide blue eyes.

“This is Fulcrum with an urgent transmission. The Empire is working on something called Project Stardust. I don’t have more information than the name, but funding may be diverted from the Defender Project. Whatever it is, it must be a bigger threat. Fulcrum out.”

Kallus sighed as he shut off the transmitter and looked over at the loth-cat who was now purring loudly. At least someone was happy.

-

Thrawn returned to Lothal a week later. Kallus was glad as it meant that he no longer had to solely deal with Pryce. He was waiting for Thrawn’s shuttle to land, the weight of his bo-rifle reassuring on his back. When Thrawn exited the shuttle, there was an excited glimmer in his eyes that made Kallus’ stomach sink. Before Thrawn spoke, he already knew what the Grand Admiral was going to say.

“I have the location of the rebel base, Agent Kallus. We attack in one hour.”

“Yes, sir.” Kallus said, his voice oddly calm.

He had to get to the comms tower before Thrawn could mobilize his fleet. Time was against him to get a warning off to the Rebels. As soon as Thrawn’s back was turned, he bolted and ran for where he’d parked his speeder and gunned it.

Kallus didn’t see Thrawn turn around and watch him, eyes narrowing in suspicion.

The journey to the comms tower was faster than it had ever been, mostly because he was gunning it (and desperately hoping that this wasn’t one of the bad speeders). His heart was pounding as he waited for the turbo lift to reach the top. This was it for sure. His final transmission. After this, well, hopefully he’d be able to sneak off world somehow. Maybe he could hide until the Rebels came and rescued him when they saved Lothal. Either way, he had a bad feeling about this.

Kallus sat down at the broadcasting station and took a deep breath. This was it. It seemed fitting that he was making this final transmission by the light of Lothal’s moons.

“This is Fulcrum with an urgent message. Thrawn knows-“

“And what is it that I know, Agent Kallus?”

A deadly calm voice interrupted him and Kallus turned to see Thrawn standing in the doorway, his eyes glowing brighter than Kallus had ever seen.

Fuck.

“Please, tell your rebel friends to run and hide.” Thrawn took a step forward, a look of absolute rage on his face.

It was the most expressive Kallus had ever seen him and it was utterly terrifying.

“If I stop you first, they won’t have to,” Kallus said, a surge of confidence rushing though his veins as he drew his bo-rifle, extending it and activating the electric ends. If he killed Thrawn or at least did some real damage, that could potentially turn the tide of the larger battle.

Thrawn seemed to be shaking and Kallus realized, with growing dread, that Thrawn was _laughing_ at him.

“If you think having a weapon will give you an advantage, I’m afraid you’re sorely mistaken.”

Kallus snarled and leapt at the Chiss, clearing his mind of any hesitation. Right now, Thrawn was his enemy and he couldn’t afford to be burdened by feelings. There would be time for that later.

Thrawn dodged his first attack, gracefully moving out of the way. Kallus gritted his teeth, remembering that he wasn’t fighting a human but a Chiss warrior who was both faster and stronger than he was. Still, he would do his best.

“How long have you been working for the Rebels?” Thrawn nearly hissed at him as he dodged another strike and landed a solid punch to Kallus’ shoulder that sent him stumbling backwards, cursing as his left arm went numb.

“Not as long as I should have been.” He adjusted his grip and kept his eyes on Thrawn, bracing himself for the next attack.

“I thought I knew you!” Thrawn came at him again and Kallus was unable to block a powerful kick to his midsection that sent him flying into some old equipment, the bo-rifle dropping uselessly from his grasp. Thrawn kicked it out of the way and picked up Kallus by his tunic. Kallus struggled against Thrawn, gasping for breath. That had cracked some ribs.

“Alex, you’re breaking my heart.”

He met Thrawn’s gaze, unafraid. Thrawn was angry, yes, but there was also a hint of sadness in his eyes.

“Thrawn, I’ll never stop loving you, but you are going down a path that I can’t follow.” Kallus took a deep breath and hissed at the pain in his chest. “Because of what you’ve done and what you plan to do.”

Thrawn threw him again with a primal sound of anger. Kallus hit the broadcasting console hard and for a moment swore he could hear Kanan calling to him before a sizzle of static took over. He groaned but managed to get to his feet again, squaring up in a fighting stance. Thrawn mirrored his stance, eyes narrowed.

“You were supposed to destroy the Rebels, not join them!”

They were trading punches now. Thrawn wasn’t blocking as much as he was absorbing the punches and Kallus wondered what color Thrawn would bruise as he landed a particularly satisfying hit on a high cheekbone.

“I loved you!”

Another kick to the gut and Kallus found himself curled up on the floor, gasping for air. His bo-rifle was right there, if he could just reach it.

“Don’t try it,” warned Thrawn, kicking the bo-rifle away and picking Kallus up again. “It’s over.”

Kallus wrenched himself from Thrawn’s grip and rushed at him. The final kick was almost lazy and it sent him flying through the doorway to hit the railing with a metallic clang. His vision went hazy and the last thing he saw were red eyes, filled with nothing but hatred.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well, Eli made his appearance so I hope you're all happy. two chapters left. comments are back to non-modded. Be nice. I can always delete shit (more power, unlimited power) 
> 
> uhhh Go watch revenge of the sith. It's very good. (plagueis-izing? no? okay) I had to quote it. 
> 
> anyway, keep kudos-ing and comment if you feel like it. I enjoy the fact that other people are reading my dumb thing that I'm v proud of. kaybye


	12. The Heart of a Rebel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alexsandr Kallus has one final conversation with Thrawn. Thrawn sees something unexplainable.

“We have a transmission from Fulcrum.”

The previous message that Fulcrum had sent had sparked a series of events investigating Project Stardust. Hera wasn’t sure of the exact details at this point, but Rebel Command had been extremely interested in the information. With any luck, this transmission would contain information that was just as useful.

_“This is Fulcrum with an urgent message. Thrawn knows-“_

_“And what is it that I know, Agent Kallus?”_ The distinctive voice of the Grand Admiral cut Alex off.

“Oh no,” said Ezra and, for once, the kid spoke for them all.

_“Please, tell your rebel friends to run and hide.”_

_“If I stop you first, they won’t have to.”_

The sound of Alex’s bo-rifle activating came as a relief to the Rebels.

_“If you think having a weapon will give you an advantage, I’m afraid you’re sorely mistaken.”_

A relief that was soon crushed by Thrawn’s confident tone.

_“How long have you been working for the Rebels?”_

_“Not as long as I should have been.”_

_“I thought I knew you!”_

It was hard to make out, but it was clear that the two of them were fighting. There was the sound of things being knocked over and sounds of pain.

_“Alex, you’re breaking my heart.”_ Thrawn’s voice was raw and filled with fury and it sent a chill down Hera’s spine.

_“Thrawn, I’ll never stop loving you, but you are going down a path that I can’t follow.”_

Kanan fiddled with the comms equipment, hoping that he could get a message off, something that would reassure Alex, to let him know that he’d been heard at the very least. He squeezed Hera’s shoulder reassuring her as she covered her mouth as she realized just how much Alex was sacrificing.

_“Because of what you’ve done and what you plan to do.”_ Alex’s voice was absolutely heartbroken.

“Alex, we hear you,” Kanan managed to say in the briefest of moments that he connected back to Lothal. He projected the same thought through the Force and felt Ezra doing the same.

_Alex, we hear you._

There was an inhuman _roar_ of anger and a thudding sound and then nothing but static as the transmission was lost. Ezra’s eyes were wide in horror and he was speechless for once. Hera numbly turned off the transmission.

“No wonder Fulcrum’s intel was so strong. He was… extremely close to Thrawn.” Dodonna said.

“A most commendable sacrifice,” Sato agreed. “We must assume that Thrawn knows about the planned attack on Lothal.”

Azadi looked like he was about to comment on the situation, but his holo shimmered and vanished.

“Long range transmissions are being jammed,” Hera said. “Looks like the attack on Lothal will have to wait. I’m sorry, Ezra.”

~~~

A cold slap to the face brought Alex back to consciousness. Everything hurt, especially his face. His nose was almost certainly broken, but there was no time to assess his injuries, many as they were. There were two silent death troopers to the sides of him and his arms were painfully above him, cuffed to a supporting beam. Thrawn was too close to him, fury still burning bright in his eyes as he spoke into his comm.

“Deploy the fleet to these coordinates. I will join you shortly.” Thrawn’s voice was deadly calm and Alex bravely met his gaze.

“When did you figure it out?” Alex asked. As long as he was here, and before he suffered a painful death, he might as well know the whole story.

“I didn’t,” Thrawn said. “ISB intercepted your Fulcrum transmission about Project Stardust. They wanted to place the blame on you, but I protested against it. Agent Kallus is loyal, I told them. I was blinded by love.”

He sighed. “But then you had to run and warn them, didn’t you? You ran as soon as I told you I found the Rebel base. And so I followed. And here we are.”

Thrawn paced the small room, looking at the painted helmets with some interest. Alex felt very much like he was trapped with a predator.

“Was any of that real?” Thrawn asked.

“My feelings for you? They were - are - still incredibly real. I won’t pretend like this isn’t agony for me. But this is the right choice to make for the greater good. I can’t let my feelings get in the way of that.” 

“We are agreed on that.”

“I just don’t understand why you serve the Empire. You know the evil that they commit, the genocide, the slavery. I feel like in your core, you are a good person.” His voice cracked. “I know that much about you. I don’t understand-“

“Because I pledged to serve the Empire,” Thrawn hissed at him. “And I do not go back on my word.”

“If you joined the Rebellion, we could restore peace to the galaxy.”

“Peace?” Thrawn’s voice was incredulous. “There will never be peace. Not while evils like the Grysk still lurk in our galaxy. After your little Rebellion is gone, the Empire will put an end to them. And the next threat after that one, and after that one.”

Alex laughed. “You’re so close to the problem that you can’t even see it. It’s the _Empire_ that’s the issue. Rule by fear never works. Lothal is being destroyed to feed that machine of war, burned and stripped for anything useful. What do you think will happen when cultures are dissolved and species exterminated all for the _glory_ of the Empire? What will happen to your precious art? When your usefulness runs out, Thrawn, you’re not going to be kept around.”

“You’re not _human_.” Alex nearly spat the word. “The Empire will never have a place for you.”

Thrawn snarled at him, a wordless sound of pure anger, and a blue fist came hurtling towards his face and everything went black.

-

When Alex next woke up, he was being dragged through the halls of the _Chimaera_. The death troopers still had that firm grasp on his arms and every inch of his body hurt. He stared at his bo-rifle strapped across Thrawn’s back. That, over everything, made him the most angry.

Alex ignored the stares of the crew hurriedly passing by, openly horrified looks on their faces. He wondered what the comms channels were saying about him. His hands, at least, were now bound in front of him. His face hurt like hell. He couldn’t see out of one eye and there was still a trickle of blood running from his nose.

Why hadn’t Thrawn just killed him? What was the point to this?

They had reached the bridge. Faro wasn’t here - she’d been assigned to a different fleet. Alex was privately glad for that. He didn’t want to see the disappointment in her eyes. Instead Pryce was there, looking as smug as Alex had ever seen her. Great. Now he’d have to listen to her gloat.

“I want you to watch this battle, Agent Kallus. Know that every Rebel ship that falls is blood on your hands.” Thrawn bowed sardonically, gesturing to the wide view of the battle that raged on.

Alex was brought to the very front of the bridge by the death troopers, blasters jammed into his sides, forcing him to stare ahead at the destruction ahead of him. Behind him he could hear Thrawn calmly directing the battle. This was where Thrawn excelled and Alex was worried for the Rebels. Had his message been received? Had it been of any use?

He winced as a ship attempted to jump, only to be pulled out of hyperspace by the gravity wells and then was quickly destroyed. Alex resigned himself to watching, trying to see if the _Ghost_ was out there. Without a battle display, it was difficult to tell who was winning. It didn’t seem to be a fair fight. Not that the Empire ever fought fair.

“Konstantine! Maintain your position!” Alex heard Thrawn snarl and he smiled despite himself. Infighting was a good sign in this case.

There was a blossom of flames as the Star Destroyer was cleaved in half by a last-ditch effort by one of the Rebel ships.

“How odd that he undermined your authority, Thrawn.” Alex commented. “Perhaps Konstantine finally came to his senses.”

“How dare you-“ Pryce snapped. 

“Governor Pryce, I will handle this matter myself.” Alex could feel Thrawn’s gaze as the man walked towards him and Alex silently began to say his goodbyes. “Maintain formation and press the attack. I will be back after I have… dealt with this.”

Thrawn roughly hauled Alex to his feet. Alex clenched his teeth and managed to not scream at the pain that ran through every part of his body. Thrawn’s hand was freezing at his neck as he walked him off the bridge. The crew was absolutely silent, entirely focused on the battle and not wanting to raise the ire of the Grand Admiral any more than it already was.

Thrawn shoved him into the turbo lift, Alex barely managing to catch himself from slamming into the wall with his cuffed hands.

“I wonder what Vanto would think of you now.” Alex said, watching a drop of blood fall onto the spotless floor.

“Vanto knows that the Empire only commands the loyalty of my actions, not of my mind or heart.”

“By my math, that’s one third too much.”

The turbolift door opened and Thrawn steered him down the hall and towards an airlock.  
  
“You deserve more than being shot and shoved out an airlock, but I’m afraid it will have to suffice.”

A cold hand left his back and Alex turned to see Thrawn holding his bo-rifle. Great. Shot by his own weapon.

“I will be sure to keep this in a place of honor.”

Nothing else angered him more than hearing Thrawn say that and he was about to snarl a witty retort back when he heard a strange meowing sound. Both of them turned to look and Alex saw a look of confusion pass over Thrawn’s face. There was a white loth-cat in the hall, hackles raised and hissing at Thrawn and then a sound that Alex had come to associate with Kanan, an ethereal note.

Thrawn heard it too, his head tilting in a way that Alex still found endearing, distracted enough for Alex to pull a trick he’d learned while in the ISB and the cuffs dropped from his wrists. Thrawn turned, but Alex was faster for once and grabbed the bo-rifle as he kicked Thrawn’s legs from underneath him. The Chiss hit the deck like a sack of bricks, the loth-cat hissing right in his face. Alex quickly extended the bo-rifle and activated the electric ends, swiftly planting one end on Thrawn’s chest. The sound that Thrawn made was terrifying, a kind of growling keen, his eyes still filled with anger that slowly turned to acceptance as his body convulsed.

“Wish things had been different, Thrawn.” He switched the bo-rifle off, seeing that Thrawn was about to pass out (and was smoking slightly). “Maybe when the war’s over. Maybe we could get a second chance.”

Thrawn didn’t reply, the glow in his eyes dimming as he lost consciousness.

“Thanks… Whatever you really are.” Alex told the loth-cat. “Let’s get to an escape pod.”

The loth-cat meowed in apparent agreement and jumped to his shoulder. Alex felt positively triumphant as he ran down the hall and keyed open an escape pod. The relief he felt as the escape pod jettisoned was eclipsed by, oh yeah, still a huge space battle going on. He quickly keyed in a Fulcrum transmission, hoping that the _Ghost_ was still out there and hadn’t been destroyed.

His vision was going hazy despite a rough tongue licking his cheek. He saw the underbelly of the _Ghost_ eclipse him and then everything went dark.

~~~

“Easy there, Alex,” Zeb grunted as he pulled the Human out of the escape pod. He was a lot heavier than he looked. “You got a pet, I guess. That’s fun.”

Alex was in rough shape. There wasn’t much they could do for him, especially not in the middle of a battle.

“Do you have him?” Hera yelled.

“Yes!” Zeb yelled back. “He’s in bad shape. Thrawn did a number on him.”

“It’ll have to wait - we’re retreating back to Atollon.”

Zeb managed to keep his balance as the _Ghost_ turned abruptly. At the very least, he could make Alex comfortable as he could.

“Thank you,” he told the unconscious man. “I mean it.”

~~~

Thrawn limped back onto the bridge. He’d managed to haul himself up but Kallus was long gone. It didn’t matter. The battle was all that mattered.

“What’s the status?” he growled, straightening up as he faced Pryce and biting back a hiss of pain.

“It seems that the Rebels are retreating, Grand Admiral.”

“Good.” He walked to the front of the bridge and stood where Kallus had knelt. “Prepare for orbital bombardment. Let’s test their mettle.”

~~~

“Am I alive?” Alex said to himself, dazed and confused as he stared at… the underneath of a bunk.

“Don’t move, Alex,” came a familiar gruff voice. “You look like hell.”

He couldn’t laugh, but he could smile. “I feel like hell.”

“This all from Thrawn?” Zeb asked.

“Yeah. Though I landed my fair share of punches.”

“Good on you.”

“And I shocked him good. You should have seen his face.”

“I bet it was a real good look.”

“I’ve never seen him so surprised.” Alex sighed, the sleeping loth-cat purring from its position on his chest. “How’s the battle?”

“We’re back on Atollon for now. Ezra’s gone for help and Kanan’s, uh, getting help from a friend? I’m really not sure what he’s up to.”

“Sounds like the usual.”

“Yeah, pretty much. You just rest here, okay?”

“Zeb, don’t die.” Alex told him.

“You too, Alex.”

~~~

It was the sound of thunder and a booming voice yelling about Kanan Jarrus that woke him. Alex limped out into the corridor, seeing new faces everywhere he looked. Fellow rebels that smiled tiredly at him. He managed to find Zeb again, the one familiar face.  
  
“Glad you made it.”

“Yeah,” said Zeb, with a roll of his eyes. “Kanan’s _friend_ really helped out.”

Kanan entered the room and pointed right at Zeb, his face bare of that mask he’d been wearing. “I heard that.”

“I’m glad you’re okay,” Alex said, relieved for once to see the Jedi. “Thank you for rescuing me. All of you. I don’t deserve it.”

Alex winced as Kanan hugged him, unsure of how to react. He settled for patting Kanan’s back.

“You sacrificed _everything_ for our cause. Thank you.”

Kanan’s hands were a comforting weight on his shoulders and Alex felt some of the sadness lift from his heart.

“We’re clear!” Hera yelled from the cockpit.

A cry of triumph filled the whole ship and Alex cheered along with them. The white loth-cat sitting at his feet howled along. As tears ran down his face, Alex realized that he was truly happy for the first time in a long time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading. It's been a wild... week? two weeks? that I've been writing this. there's going to be an epilogue, so please stay tuned for that. 
> 
> this story was mostly to prove to myself that, yes, I could write again and that, yes, people enjoy my writing, and, most key to me, that I can write a full story with a start, a middle, and an end. It was also to stick something good in a tag that was lacking exactly what I wanted to read. the age old motto of "if it don't exist, write it." 
> 
> I won't promise a sequel or a prequel, but there's a distinct possibility. I will be editing this story, so if you're reading this in a month or so, some things might have changed. mostly minor but I can't be certain. 
> 
> Always in motion the future is. 
> 
> And yes, I did change the title of the whole darn thing.


	13. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The end.

Yavin 4 was a beautiful planet. There was a weird sort of energy in the air that Alex figured had something to do with the old Jedi Temples. Everything seemed to, in the end, connect back to the Jedi. After a week or so in a bacta tank, he’d finally recovered enough to be debriefed. The debriefing was much kinder than what the Empire typically did. It took the form of three interviews. One with Hera, one with Kanan, and one with Mon Mothma.

To Mon Mothma, he’d given all the ISB secrets he knew wouldn’t change. Any Imperial information that he knew would be of benefit to the Rebellion spilled from the recesses of his mind. If anything, he wanted to unburden himself of that knowledge.

With Kanan, he talked about the white loth-cat and how it had appeared at pivotal moments. It was still here; he was taking care of it and feeding it. Alex had a feeling that the animal didn’t belong here, that it needed to go back to Lothal. They all needed to go back to Lothal - things would only get worse.

“I only escaped because I got lucky.”

“That wasn’t luck,” said Kanan. “That was the Force.”

The conversation with Hera had been about his relationship with Thrawn, acknowledging his sacrifice and, gently, asking if his feelings would compromise the Rebellion.

“No,” Alex said. “I still love him, but that won’t stop me from doing the right thing.”

“Does he have any obvious weaknesses that you know of?”

He stared down at his hands, gently held by green ones and thought of Thrawn holding his hands. The emotional pain was far worse than the physical pain he’d suffered.

“I can’t tell you about his tactics. I don’t know his weaknesses when it comes to battle. I don’t know how to kill him. I can tell you how he likes his caf. I can tell you what kind of drink he’d order at a cantina and how much he’d tip. I can tell you what he looks like while he’s asleep. I could tell you that he was once a much different person. I could tell you that he still cares about his people, the Chiss, enough to have contact with them, but even that they could not sway his loyalty to the Empire. I wish I could help, but the things I know about Thrawn are not of use to the Rebellion.”

Slowly but surely, he became more and more comfortable with the Rebellion. He was valued here, unlike he’d ever been in the Empire, in the ISB. When it came time to free Lothal, he happily participated.

Alex never saw Thrawn in person again before the Purrgil took away the _Chimaera._ It was probably better that way.

The Empire fell shortly afterwards. It hadn’t been an easy fight, but he welcomed it.

When he saw the planet of Lira San and was welcomed along the Lasat, he thought he could almost forget about the past. He could almost move on.

But he’d gone back to Lothal, just to see how things were going. To see how they’d rebuilt, to see Sabine. On that day, he’d met someone that the Rebels talked about with great admiration. Ahsoka Tano. The first Fulcrum. A not-Jedi.

Ahsoka had asked Sabine to join her in the hunt for Ezra and Thrawn. And then she asked Alex if he would also come with.

“Of course.” Alex said.

The Empire was gone now and the galaxy was becoming a different place. Maybe Thrawn had changed too. Whatever the result, Alex desperately wanted a conclusion to that story. He didn’t want to always be wondering what happened to Thrawn and if he was still out there, somewhere.

And so their journey began.

~ Fin ~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow. Thanks for reading! I'm really proud of this. Dang. 
> 
> God when will we fuckin find out what happened to Ezra and Thrawn??? Timmy Z are you gonna give us those hot dets? or is it gonna be DF and JF??? FUCK. well, more Timmy Z Thrawn content at the end of April so that's good. uuuuhhh fuck. please go watch season 4 of rebels again. it's a masterpiece. 
> 
> anyways thanks for reading and maybe I'll write more in this little au thing I've created but I'm gonna uhhhh try to write a Original Novel tm so that maybe in a few years I too can be on the shelves of Barnes & Nobel in hardcover. 
> 
> The Force will be with you. Always.


End file.
